flailure:

I once met a girl at party. She came home with me and sex happened. We fell asleep, then at some point in the night, I awoke and slipped out of bed. I started feeling around in the dark until I found her purse. In her purse, I found her keys. With her still sleeping, I took the keys and left my…

I wish this was a daily feature called, “Ohhh, Jim Hamilton…”