Morning Debriefing 2/14/12

1) 2 FOR THE PRICE OF 1: Best #Grammys and #RejectedCandyHearts Tweets from yesterday from LA:

“@pauljaycomic Arcade Fire won the Grammy for Best Album. Does this mean the Grammys are suddenly relevant, or that Arcade Fire are suddenly irrelevant?” Paul Jay

“@ChelseaVPeretti I’d like to watch a singer who is a single threat: good at singing.” Chelsea Peretti

“@WendyLiebman In lieu of watching the #Grammys, I sang karaoke while balancing an egg on a spoon.” Wendy Liebman

“@moshekasher WHO IS ANYONE IN MUSIC? I literally do not know any of these white people! #grammys” Moshe Kasher

“@FrankConniff If Lady Gaga was "born this way” did doctor tell her parents, “Congratulations! It’s a 9 pound publicity whore!” #Grammys" Frank Conniff

“@paulcibis 500 ft. Away At All Times Is Just A Number #rejectedcandyhearts” Paul Cibis

“@Kabelion I’m going to kill you and your family (turn over) if you break up with me. #candyheartrejects” Jeremy Paul

“@TesstifyBarker This is made of birth control pills I haven’t been taking. #candyheartrejects” Tess Barker

“@scott_bowser D-FENS #rejectedcandyhearts” Scott Bowser

“@teamyasumura Get in the car. #candyheartrejects” Robert Yasumura

“@mrseanpatton At least this ain’t cum #rejectedcandyhearts” Sean Patton 

2) WIN A DATE at WHAT’S UP TIGER LILY? TONIGHT If anything, a date with a comedian will leave you with a great story.  YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO LOSE (well… perhaps your innocence depending on who you go out with)

3) OK, every Big Trouble in Little Tokyo is fantastic, but, with all gravity I can muster, this week we have none other than Ron Lynch AND Sean Patton!!!  I’m not going to bother saying anything else other than sign-up is at 6:30PM/start is at 7PM/@Señor Fish-address is 422 E. 1st St., Los Angeles, CA. Really, that’s all I need to say.

4) Misery is a Self-Centered Wanna Be: A Cautionary Tale to Comics on Valentine’s Day (just in case you didn’t want to scroll down four or five posts)

5) Tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL-Yes, comedy is the right choice for Valentine’s Day.
Just for Laughs Sketch Showcase @ UCB Theatre 5PM FREE
Just for Laughs Showcase @ Jon Lovitz Comedy Club 8PM $5/2 drink min.
Harland Williams @ Irvine Improv (Special Valentine’s Day Event) 8PM $65 dinner special
What’s Up Tiger Lily?: The Wigmaker’s Son @ Hollywood Studio Bar & Grill
Are You F*#king Kidding Me? @ Puka Bar 8:30PM FREE
Stand Up Saloon @ Old Towne Pub 10PM FREE
Keep It Clean Comedy @ 1739 Public House 10PM FREE 

6) OPEN MIC RUN 2/14/11
SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/one item min.
HARLEM PLACE CAFE 124 W. 4th St. (in alley between Main and Spring St.)/Starts 8PM/e-mail for spots
GROUND ZERO CAFE 615 Childs Way, Los Angeles, CA (USC on campus nestled in between dorms near intersection of Figueroa and Exposition)/USC student Sign-up 9PM/Non Student Sign-up 9:15PM/Starts 9:30PM 
MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5 Cover/Free coffee & water.

7) Recently: Local LA Reporter Serene Branson literally spoke gibberish on TV last night in a post Grammys report, perhaps taking a cue from Mike O’Connell.

8) Yes, mr. or ms. bad crowd work comic, I came here alone and perhaps I’m too good of a person as I will not engage with you, but seriously, tell a damn joke or quip or just a line that first off makes sense and then strive to be actually funny.  More importantly, leave me alone like I already am.

Report 00115

THE COMEDY BUREAU/@thecomedybureau