Morning Debriefing 4/4/11

Morning Debriefing 12/12/10

Morning Debriefing 11/27/10

Morning Debriefing 11/1/10

Nightly Bulletin 10/31/10

1) American-the Bill Hicks Story hits U.S. theatres this week on April 8th, but the earliest you can see it is April 13th at the Comedy Store then April 15th at the Laemmle Sunset 5. Something is wrong with this picture. If it changes, the Comedy Bureau will let you know.

2) LA via Australia–Hear clips of Garfunkel and Oates & Maria Bamford live in Melbourne

3) Brand New Open Mic coming next week:
Smiles Nightclub
13615 Ventura Boulevard
Sherman Oaks, CA 91423
Every other Wednesday
5 minutes of stage time with 1 item purchase
$3 Domestic Beer, $3 Soda, Half off apps
Contact Chris Dunham or TK Matteson
www.facebook.com/chrisdunhamlive–www.facebook.com/tkocomedy

4) The Comedy Bureau’s own calendars have been updated with a few new venues!

5) Once again, Conan on WTF w/Marc Maron.

6) Tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL
What’s Up Tiger Lily @ Hollywood Studio Bar & Grill 8PM FREE
Keep It Clean @ 1739 Public House 10PM FREE
Crash Test @ UCB Theatre 11PM $5

7) OPEN MIC RUN
RED ROCK 8782 W. Sunset Blvd., West Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM/multiple sets allowed/$5 min.
CLUB 705 705 Pier Ave., Hermosa Beach, CA/Starts 7PM-ish
JAKE’S 38 W. Colorado Blvd., Pasadena, CA/Sign-up (lottery) 7:30PM/Starts 8PM
TRIBAL CAFE 1651 W. Temple St., Los Angeles, CA (Echo Park)/Starts 8PM/call (213) 483-4458
D’AMORE’S 8369 W. 3rd St., Los Angeles, CA/Sign-up (lottery) 8PM/Purchase required
GROUND ZERO USC 615 Childs Way, Los Angeles, CA/USC Campus/Nestled between 3 dormitories approximately a block away from the intersection of Figueroa and Exposition/USC student sign-up 9PM/non-USC-student sign-up 9:15/Starts 9:30PM

8) Yesterday, the Comedy Bureau posted the article, “Why are THEY on the Show?” about the unfortunate trading of spots on shows that happens in LA and some readers were wondering a few things. Specifically, The Comic’s Comic wondered about comics who struggle to get stage time starting their own room. I have no problem with other comics starting their own room to get their own stage time if they can’t get it elsewhere. Again, I reiterate stay away from trading spots. Whether they are good or bad as comics is a matter of subjectivity to me really, but, as I point out in the article, if they can find an audience of their own, my opinion doesn’t really matter. Another reader wondered that if a person works the Haha, Ice House, Comedy Store, Improv that they should get a shot at performing at another room. First off, there are plenty of comics that are (and I’m putting this very politely) raw that get to perform at all of those clubs. Once more, as I pointed in the article, plenty of comics can get laughs, but if they’re not funny to the booker, why should the booker put them up? Last week, I saw someone do nothing but offensive material jumbling up the most controversial topics to date (i.e. Libya, Tsunami, and Liz Taylor’s Death) into one dick joke ridden mess and kill. Did I laugh? I didn’t even smile. Just because this comic happened to do good on a certain night because they had a good spot on the show, I don’t feel obligated or guilted to promote their comedy as, plain and simple, I don’t find them funny. If you have any further questions regarding this article or anything else, please send them to thecomedybureau@gmail.com.

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1) Last night, instead of performing/watching comedy, I was pretty much coerced into going into my mother’s Christmas work party at the Hilton Alhambra (one of the most Asian-centric parts of town) as a form of Christmas family time bonding, which is simultaneously a horrible situation I have no desire of being in AND a great source for material, especially considering the honest, personal approach I take to my act. Knowing that everyone’s process of developing material for performing comedy is drastically different, I’d like to offer a glimpse into my own personal process where I draw directly from personal experience. Listed below is a series of tweets I wrote throughout the duration of the party/death march of boredom/worst quiz I have ever sat through that will probably turn into 1-2 minutes of material (will keep you updated on progress). Perhaps, all of these random 140 characters or less thoughts will become nothing, but, either way, this is where my my comedy writing process starts…

-Surrounded by first generation Asians in the patient care industry. Already feeling uncomfortable. Step 1 complete.
-I don’t know why I checked Asian/Paciic Islander on any application. I don’t relate to any of these people. #jokesomewhere
-I have more in common with the “table 8” sign than all the Asian people here as it doesn’t tell me, “Go to grad school.”
-Currently listening to lounge version of Girl From Impanema, which sounds like the original if it was dosed with Ambien.
-If someone asks if I do jokes about how I’m not an Asian doctor, I would consider them heckling me in conversation
-I’m uncomfortable with how Asian-centric this party is; I feel about as asian as Mickey Rooney in Breakfast at Tiffany’s
-“Go ahead and speak Asian! I wasn’t going to talk to you anyway!” something I want to say at this party.
-Yelling “I’m not Asian for fuck sakes” is a bad idea. Christmas Techno music… a much worst idea.
-Christmas parties like this make me understand why cyanide for human consumption was discovered. #toodark? #dontcare
-Someone who can barely speak English is giving speech; needs translator who speaks “shut the hell up I’m hungry as fuck”
-Knowing how to use chopsticks is about as Asian as I get. #igrewupinamerica #damnit #usausausa
-Phone was nearly dead and thus kept me from sharing my hate of this stupid party with the world.
-in a quiz for a prize in which the answer to why did Scrooge change his mind was because he cared about people #bullshit
-My answer to scrooge’s change of heart: fear of the proletariat rise #yeahimpretentious #ihatethisparty
-In a room full of Asians, the answer to How many planets are there in our solar system was somehow 9. #falsestereotypes
-“Tokyo is the most populated city, bitch and that motherfucker doesn’t deserve a TV.” Christmas brings out the best in us.
-Into hour 5 of this party and I just want to yell racial epithets so I can leave.
-Actual Riddle for TV: Harry died on land and people were happy, David dies on land and people were happier. Who are they?
-Answer to riddle in last tweet: they were typhoons. My answer: Go fuck yourself
-For big screen tv, we’re asked to pick out three distinct items in a picture of a bum and a volunteer. #whyamistillhere
-My next set of answers to this quiz are going to be shenanigans, gobbledygook , and complete and utter bullshit.
-It irks me to think why my Dad ever wonders why I appear to be angry on stage. #6hrparty

2) Going on tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL is a perfect alternative to going postal on people in the Grove parking structure because you want to show off this year at Christmas. Start off with Jeff Garlin’s Combo Platter @ UCB Theatre 6PM $2, then Eban Schletter’s Cosmic Christmas @ Glendale Planetarium 5PM/7PM $10, then Alonzo Bodden @ Brea Improv 7PM $17/2 item min., then Race Riot @ Hollywood Improv 7:30PM $14/2 item min., then ASSSSCAT @ UCB Theatre 7:30PM FREE, then Comedy Night @ Chatterbox 8PM FREE, then Please, Thank You, & You’re Welcome @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE, then French Toast @ Taix 8:30PM FREE, then Top Story Weekly @ iO West 9PM $5, then The Comedy Crush Bad Sweater Holiday Show @ The Hollywood Improv 9:30PM $14/2 item min., then Sunday Sunday Sunday @ Improv Space 9:30PM FREE.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: PALMS 8572 Santa Monica Blvd., West Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM, SUNSET GRILL 7439 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM/one item min., SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Los Angeles, CA/Starts 6PM/one item min., MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed

4) The Comedy Bureau Calendars is finally updated in full!!! Every single club listed actually goes to there Calendars/Upcoming shows page. All of the minor inconvenience that remained on that list is now completely GONE offering you ease in searching for shows in LA unless clicking is a “big deal” for you.

5) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to JACKIE KASHIAN-“@jackiekashian I said to him, "so you’ve never done standup before?” he paused. a long time. “open mike?” he said, “well, I was on the bus this one time.” After heckling Sam Kinison many years ago, Jackie has never looked back in her vast and successful journey as a comedienne. Touring throughout the world and having been on TV several times, she shares her uproariously funny anecdotes about her dad, her husband, and herself. Thus, do not miss Jackie’s hilarious podcast Dorkforest or her website, blog, or Twitter.

6) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Jon Stewart Stand Up (1996)

7) If you read the Twitter feed excerpt from above, I think you’ll agree with me in wanting to donate to the Comedy Bureau. Do so right here.

8) As I stride further and further into comedy, I seem to know less and less “real” people. The “jury” is still out on whether this is a good or bad thing. The Comedy Bureau will keep you updated on my/its sanity.

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1) I have to give credit once more to Shayne Michael and the energy he has put back into the iCandy open mic/K.A.S. Comedy Etc. Show. With being one of the longest running open mics in the LA area, iCandy/Coffee Haven has seen its share of highs and lows and with a new sound system and a revitalized format that keeps a good energy about the room (i.e. booked show, raffles, etc.), comics who go to iCandy can expect to actually work on their material, which is the purpose of an open mic.

2) What better way to get into the holiday spirit than going to a run of shows that include the words: milk, asssscat, boners, back room, and family. THUS, don’t miss tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL with Two Milk Minimum @ Flappers Burbank 12:30PM $10/2 item min., then Space Boners Gives Thanks! @ Silverlake Lounge 7PM FREE, then ASSSSCAT @ UCB Theatre 8PM $10 (stand by only), then The Back Room @ UCB Theatre 10PM $10, and finish with Ron Lynch and Craig Anton host a Tomorrow! Family Thanksgiving @ Steve Allen Theater MIDNIGHT $8.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: LAUNDROMIC 1054 Vine St. Los Angeles, CA/Starts 4PM, WESTSIDE COMEDY THEATRE 1323-A 3rd St (in alley between 3rd and 4th)/Sign-up (lottery) 6PM/Starts 6:30PM/3-5 min., SUNSET GRILL 7439 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM, MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5 cover/multiple sets allowed.

4) As it was brought to my attention, even though I knew I needed to get around to it, the “Bureau Approved” page is updated again with a section for shows and open mics. Also, the “Calendars” page got updated with Comedy Store Line-ups and link directly to the Largo Calendar. I might be running out of ways to make this easier for you guys… I’m just sayin’.

5) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to PAUL DANKE “@pauldanke every black friday, I get up early, go to best buy, and when the doors open. I rob the shit out of people’s cars. #IPODSFOREVERYONE” When not chilling back in his jean jacket, Paul Danke absolutely rips it on stage. According to several sources, Danke closed out the Holy Fuck! One Year Anniversary like a hero, which is certainly no surprise to the Comedy Bureau. Going up all around town as well as his own fantastic show The Comedy Garage (run with Cornell Reid and Sean Green), Paul has definitely earned his praise for his stand-up as well as doing featured blogging for FunnyorDie.com. You can witness Paul Danke tomorrow at French Toast @ Taix 8:30PM FREE or on his blog The Art of Coming Off Casual or his amazing Twitter.

6) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Michael Keaton does Stand-up

7) Donate here. Live Tweeting here. Donate here. Live Tweeting here. (insert catchy jingle that’s so catchy you would actually do either or both of the two)

8) On the subject of handling hecklers: Why is there the type of heckler who interrupts your set and then applauds and congratulates you after you yell at him for 4 minutes ripping him to shreds as a person? There should be a new subcategory of psychological disorders in DSM IV that addresses this.

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1) Schtick or Treat @ Taix made the word “epic” seem a woeful and paltry adjective in attempting to describe what was one of the best times I’ve ever had a comedy show. Even though there were over 30 performers, it was the epitome of a “good ol’ time” the whole way through. Seriously, what other show in LA can you see “Steve Martin”,“Russell Brand”, “Carrot Top”, “Eddie Pepitone”, “Sarah Silverman”, “Rowdy Roddy Piper”, “Kyle Kinane”, “Gilbert Gottfried”, “Andy Kindler”, “Weird Al Yankovic”, and “Jake Weisman”? That’s right you can’t think of one until 364 days from now, but go to the normally schedule French Toast every Sunday 8:30PM for FREE at the same lovely 321 Lounge @ Taix.

2) Tonight’s “Comedy Crawl” is slightly more manageable, IF YOU CAN TELEPORT!!! Go to What’s Up Tiger Lily? @ Hollywood Studio Bar & Grill 8:30PM FREE, then Hotel Cafe Presents: Hotel Comedy @ The Hotel Cafe 9PM $15, then Keep It Clean @ 1739 Public House 10PM FREE, then make your last “jump” to Crash Test @ The UCB Theatre 11PM $5. BLAM!!! (if that’s the sound you make when/if you teleport)

3) Like I mentioned yesterday, there’s a new feature in a long line of innovations from the Comedy Bureau that allows you to keep track of most regularly scheduled live comedy in LA. NOW UPDATED WITH THE J-SPOT. Other fine comedy establishments soon to follow. Again here it is, The Comedy Bureau’s very own Calendars.

4) Unlike “real people” with “actual money”, comedians have to/should be working on our act and, as such, THE COMEDY BUREAU will be attempting an open mic run of 3 spots, which, if you know anything about driving in LA, is near impossible. Well, IMPOSSIBLE CAN GO TAKE A DIRT NAP!!! TRIBAL CAFE. GROUND ZERO USC. TAIX. The Comedy Bureau’s very own Bureau Director will be live tweeting during this test of endurance/patience/more patience, so stay tuned for the play-by-play right here.

5) At least, someone likes us. Thanks Shayne-Michael.com

6) Now it has a face. The Big Trouble in Little Tokyo Open Mic. NOV. 9TH. 6:30PM. Please don’t forget, mostly because I don’t have any enforceable consequences if you do.

7) Given the impulsive notion of large scale chain retailers in the U.S., is it too early to tell Black Friday jokes?

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« October 2020 »

October 31, 2010

Uncategorized

burbank, calendars, comedy, dominic dierkes, echo park, flappers, french toast, hollywood, josh fadem, la, laugh drink repeat, morning debriefing, schtick or treat, taix, ucb

1) Last night was seeming reserved for “getting material” as opposed to actually performing or seeing one of the many damn good shows around town. Let’s just say, I got plenty of material spending a few hours in the early morning hours of Halloween at an El Tacos Gavilan… and none of it was pretty… UNLESS YOU MEAN PRETTY HILARIOUS!!! (seriously, it was quite painful seeing, out of the corner of my eye, obese-trying-way-too-hard-to-be-slutty-girl-devil snarfing down a tray full of greasy, greasy carne asada tacos).

2) Though you’re probably already wearing your costume tour de force ready to destroy Halloween parties across LA county with how ingenious and clever it is, there is still some ghoulish-ly FANTASTIC comedy to go on a Comedy Crawl with Laugh. Drink. Repeat. @ Flappers 7:30PM $10/2 drink min., then the amazing Schtick or Treat @ Taix 8:30PM FREE, where several comedians go as several more successful comedians and do their act (sidenote: I’m on this show), then Nighttime w/Dominic Dierkes @ UCB Theatre 9:30PM $5 (stand-by only), then end the night at another late night Mexican hole in the wall taco stand because I really want this to become a bit/hate myself.

3) Ever find yourself just wanting to seeing comedy with utter desperation, but can’t really navigate through comedy club websites to find what the hell is going on? There’s a new feature from the Comedy Bureau that address that extremely specific annoyance AND it’s right here, a page w/links to every frequent comedy venue calendar in LA, except Largo’s as there site is completely Flash based, but I’ll figure out a work around. Again, this amazing innovation for all you LA Comedy denizens is right here.

4) LA Comedian/pratfall extraordinaire Josh Fadem can’t control himself on Halloween. Funny or Die agrees. Check it out here.

5) You should probably give the guy who says that he’s dressed up as a “happier version of himself if he could afford therapy and it actually worked” a break. He’s probably going through something. Maybe he can’t afford an ironically obscure costume or a costume at all or maybe he’s just trying to make up for that one year when he was 8 and dressed up as the Washington Monument and didn’t understand the phallic significance of what he was doing. Just give him a break. OK?

6) Big Trouble in Little Tokyo Open Mic @ Señor Fish. Nov. 9th. 6:30PM. Past the point of no return, so it DEFINITELY has to be AWESOME!!! More details will be leaked day by day.

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