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January 4, 2018
Uncategorized
alison stevenson, anna seregina, ast records, bar lubitsch, clare o'kane, free comedy, free show, los angeles, megan koester, stand up, weho, west hollywood

Clare O’Kane is returning from NYC to record her debut album for AST Records and it’s definitely something you should back Bar Lubitsch’s back room wall to wall for. 

Also, it’s FREE.

The rest of our listings for comedy shows, events, open mics, maps, and more can be found at www.thecomedybureau.com.

December 13, 2017
Uncategorized
bar lubitsch, blair beeken, drew cullinan, jana schmieding, kat palardy, lauren olson, madonna refugia, the gnat

Whether you think the ever revered storytelling institution known as The Moth needs to be taken down a notch or not, you’ll probably enjoy this spectacular comedic impression of The Moth known as The Gnat.

The next edition is this coming Monday, December 18th at Bar Lubitsch in WeHo at 7:30PM. Admission is FREE. Get more details here.

The rest of our listings for comedy shows, events, open mics, maps, and more can be found at www.thecomedybureau.com.

June 6, 2017
Uncategorized
bar lubitsch, chris fairbanks, comedy show, live comedy, los angeles, stand up, taping, weho

Next week, Chris Fairbanks, a undeniable favorite of ours, is taping a new hour special next week at one of our favorite venues in town to watch stand-up, Bar Lubitsch.

If you in or around LA next Tuesday, please make sure you $5 cash on you to go see these tapings of what we’re pretty sure will be a damn good time.

The rest of our listings for comedy shows, events, open mics, maps, and more can be found at www.thecomedybureau.com.

August 14, 2016
Uncategorized
ahamed weinberg, august 16, bar lubitsch, chris garcia, comedy show, joshua turek, kyle mizono, los angeles, stand up, twelve twenty forty five, weho, west hollywood, what to do

Ahamed Weinberg and Joshua Turek present an evening of stand-up where you get to see more than 5 minutes from comedians that you should be watching more than 5 minutes of.

Get more details here.

The rest of our listings for comedy shows/events as well as open mics and maps are embedded at www.thecomedybureau.com.

July 14, 2016
Uncategorized
a special thing, album taping, ast records, bar lubitsch, casey ley, comedy show, david gborie, james fritz, july 24th, los angeles, megan koester, stand up, weho, west hollywood, what to do

It’s free to attend, not that it should matter for going to a taping of James Fritz, but you definitely should go to this. More details here.

The rest of our listings for comedy shows/events as well as open mics and maps are embedded at www.thecomedybureau.com.

Poster by Ivy McNally

On The Horizon: Twelve. Twenty. Forty Five. 2/16

February 11, 2016
Uncategorized
ahamed weinberg, bar lubitsch, beth stelling, comedy shows, james austin johnson, joshua turek, los angeles, west hollywood

Twelve. Twenty. Forty Five., hosted by Ahamed Weinberg and Joshua Turek, is part of a new wave of showcases here in LA that give deserving comedians bigger chunks of time. The next edition of this show on Tues. Feb. 16th is one to not miss.

Morning Debriefing 6/8/11

June 8, 2011
Uncategorized
america's got talent, andres du bouchet, bar lubitsch, cd taping, cheap, comedy central, comedy crawl, comedy news, comedy shows, culver city, dava krause, downtown, drink with dave, free, greg proops, hollywood, house, improv, james adomian, long beach, lopez tonight, los angeles, melissa villaseñor, nbc, open mic run, puddin, stephen falk, tbs, weeds, west hollywood

1) Comedy Bureau favorite JAMES ADOMIAN will be on Lopez Tonight on TBS at MIDNIGHT. Watch live, set your DVR’s, OR check back here tomorrow as it will be posted.

 

2) Andrés Du Bouchet’s taping is tonight 10PM at Bar Lubitsch (7702 Santa Monica Blvd., West Hollywood, CA). This is a perfect part to be a part of comedy history/catch his one-of-a-kind absurdist stand-up/laugh until it hurts and then finding a way to laugh some more.

3) Thai Rivera will be debuting his new self-titled album at the Ontario Improv (4555 Mills Circle, Ontario, CA) next Thurs. June 16th 8PM. Thai’s proof that grinding it out at open mics, no matter where they are or how they are, can, through tireless hard work pays off and does so on your own terms (i.e. headlining your own show to release your own CD).

4) Melissa Villasenor auditions at America’s Got Talent. She gives that show’s name validation. Seriously. I first saw her an indie, topic based, comedy show a year ago, and only a month or so ago, she got passed at the Comedy Store as a regular, and now, this.  Congratulations and hopefully she’ll leave Forever 21 soon. 

5) Secret comedy show at the Comedy Brewery w/Michelle Buteau.  E-mail comedybrewery@gmail.com for details.  The only thing we know is that it’s in downtown. It’s that secret.

6) Connected Comedy’s got a project for funny people with some crazy stories.

7) A Drink with Dave-Stephen Falk & Dava Krause.   

TUE June 7: Stephen Falk from Brandon Walowitz on Vimeo.

WED June 8: Dava Krause from Brandon Walowitz on Vimeo.

8) “@GregProops-To everyone freaking out about the Reagan cartoon, laughing at what you disagree with is called being sophisticated.” Agreed.

9) Puddin’-“Karate Kid”

10) COMEDY CRAWL
Greg Proops: Smartest Man in the World @ Comedy Central Stages 8PM FREE (RSVP at 323-960-5519)
If This Doesn’t Work, I’m Moving Home @ Harlem Place Cafe
8PM FREE 
The Armando Show w/Angela Kinsey, Kate Flannery, and Kate Walsh @ iO West 8PM $25
Andre Hyland Presents: The Jesse Miller Talk Show @ Hollywood Improv Lab
8:30PM $5 
Meltdown @ Meltdown Comics 8:30PM $8
Pizza Party @ DiPiazza’s 9PM FREE
Facebook @ UCB Theatre 9:30PM $5 (stand by only)
Beer in the Shower @ Whitehorse Cocktail Lounge Inn 9:30PM FREE 
Andrés Du Bouchet Taping @ Bar Lubitsch 10PM FREE (first 20 audience members get drink tickets)

11) OPEN MIC RUN
SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/$4 min./first come, first served
THE SPOT CAFE
4455 Overland Ave., Culver City, CA/Sign-up (lottery) 7PM 
HOLLYWOOD HOTEL 1160 N. Vermont Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM/first come, first served
CAFE ON 2ND 7 S. 2nd St., Alhambra, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 7:30PM/$3 cover/10 min. guarantee
CAFE MUSE 6547 Santa Monica Blvd., Hollywood, CA/Sign-up (lottery) 8PM 
LIBRARY A COFFEE HOUSE 3418 Broadway, Long Beach, CA/Sign-up 8PM/Starts 8:30PM 
MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel, past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5 min./multiple sets allowed/first come, first served/coffee and bottled water available 

12) People often wonder how I can mentally, emotionally, and physically stand putting up nearly 30 comics/musicians/erotic magicians every week at the Big Trouble in Little Tokyo Open Mic @ Señor Fish.  I don’t really know.  That’s how I get through it with not having an answer to that question and just doing it.  

Report 00178

THE COMEDY BUREAU/@thecomedybureau

Morning Debriefing 6/3/11

June 3, 2011
Uncategorized
andres du bouchet, bar lubitsch, bill hicks, burbank, cd taping, cheap, comedy crawl, comedy news, comedy shows, conan, eddie pepitone, empire strikes back, free, fullerton, george lucas, glendale, hollywood, how did this get made, larry david, los angeles, los feliz, nicholas cage, open mic run, patton oswalt, paul scheer, santa monica, silverlake, star wars, ucb, what to do

1) American: The Bill Hicks Story will be out on DVD in the U.S. June 7th w/5 hours of extras! Interviews, never before seen performances, and more!

2) Yesterday, I found [via A.V. Club] the perfect response to Patton Oswalt’s bit about stopping the Star Wars prequels. Thanks to Slick Gigolo, George Lucas can finally “Strike Back”.

3) Andres Du Bouchet is doing his CD taping next week at Bar Lubitsch on Wednesday and Thursday next week.  He’s a writer on Conan, but more importantly he got “boner” trending on Twitter.  Do not miss this.

4) Not quite sure what to make of this just yet, but MTV’s on Tumblr.

5) Larry David is both fun & sad for me to wait on, but mostly sad… by Brian Farrell

6) Puddin’-“Grandma”

7) Conan and the Basic Cable Band are performing for charity!!!

8) Paul Scheer’s How Did This Get Made? now has T-Shirts!!!

9) COMEDY CRAWL
Dead Authors @ UCB Theatre 6:30PM $5
First Fridays Comedy Variety Talk Show @ Theatre Asylum
9PM $5 
The Garfunkel & Oates Hour @ UCB Theatre 8PM $10 
Re-Animator the Musical @ The Steve Allen Theater 8PM $30
12 Shiny Nickels @ Hollywood Improv Lab 8:30PM $5
Stood Up Friday Night: Animals & Mythological Creatures @ Moving Arts Theatre 10PM $5 
The Roast of TJ Miller @ UCB Theatre MIDNIGHT $5 (stand by only)

10) OPEN MIC RUN
SET LIST @ FLAPPERS BAR 102 E. Magnolia, Burbank, CA/Sign-up 5PM/Starts 5:30PM/given “set list” of topics to do jokes off of/first come, first served/no purchase necessary
iCANDY 1708 E. Broadway, Long Beach, CA/Sign-up 6PM/Starts 7PM/first come, first served/$3 min./mixed mic/booked show in middle around 8PM
SILVERLAKE LOUNGE 2906 W. Sunset Blvd., Los Angeles, CA (Silverlake)/Sign-up (lottery) 6:30PM/Starts 7PM/4 min./no purchase necessary
MAX BLOOM’S 200 N. Malden Ave., Fullerton, CA/Starts 7PM/booked show after/no purchase necessary
HOLLYWOOD HOTEL 1160 N. Vermont Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM
TRINITY CHURCH 1015 California Ave., Santa Monica, CA/Starts 8PM/must work clean/no purchase necessary/mixed mic
GLENDALE DAYS INN 450 N. Pioneer Dr., Glendale, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 8PM/No foul language/No purchase necessary/first come, first served 

11) Jack Kervorkian jokes here we go (cue sound of sad party favor)…

Report 00173

THE COMEDY BUREAU/@thecomedybureau

Proopcast Next Wednesday

May 26, 2011
Uncategorized
bar lubitsch, free, greg proops, smartest man in the world, west hollywood, what to do

gregproops:

The Smartest Man in the World

Proopcasting Live!

 

Bar Lubitsch 7702 Santa Monica Blvd.

Wednesday, June 1st

7pm

Attendance is Free.

Vodka is prepared.

Send Questions for Mr. Greg to smartest@aspecialthing.com

“Bravely recording some of the boldest comedy on the podcasting frontier right now.” -Rolling Stone Magazine

Download free at http://smartest.libsyn.com/ or iTunes http://bit.ly/aqMHDl

If you’ve ever been hesitant about using the word “amazing”, go see Greg Proops podcast and you’ll change your incredibly “hard to please” demeanor.

Proopcast

March 25, 2011
Uncategorized
bar lubitsch, free, greg proops, live, podcast

gregproops:

Proopcast Live!
Wednesday, March 30 · 7:00pm
Bar Lubitsch
7702 Santa Monica Blvd.
Hollywood
Drinks
Free Admission
Drinks

Post Brunch Update 1/6/11

January 6, 2011
Uncategorized
212 cafe, asterios kokkinos, bar lubitsch, brent weinbach, cafe on 2nd, comedy, comedy bureau, comedy crate, comedy crawl, conan, dan dominguez, donate, eddie pepitone, far bar, fifty first jokes, frolic, hilarious, hollywood hotel, how to live with chelsea peretti, improv, inglewood, josh and josh show, josh rencher, kyle kinane, la, louis ck, marc maron, marty's, melissa villaseñor, open mic run

1) It’s simply not enough to say that Frolic @ Far Bar is just a great show with a fantastic line-up of comics (which it is).  With live comedy, running over 90 minutes, in my opinion, one enters extremely tricky territory as the audience tires, settles their check, and checks any pertinent e-mail/texts.  Yet producer/comic Josh Rencher

put together such a tightly-run show with a plethora of great comics (who are so funny that it doesn’t matter that they have “credits” even though they all do) comprising what could be four different amazing shows on their own that I was able to sit and watch and laugh with the packed room throughout for the entire duration (approximately 2 hours).  As host (and as cliché as this sounds, it’s true) with the most Asterios Kokkinos said, “There’s no fat on this show.”  Within one of the parts of LA that actually looks like a city and has the type of nightlife where people actually WALK around, Little Tokyo, the hip, though very retro Far Bar offered Rencher’s Frolic! that very intimate setting that live comedy demands to work.  Thus I simply enjoyed a night of some of my absolute favorites comics in LA that are regularly featured here at the Comedy Bureau and more: Host Asterios Kokkinos,

Brent Weinbach,

Paul Danke,

Zach Sherwin,

Kyle Kinane,

Melissa Villaseñor,

and Eddie Pepitone.

None of those people should be missed wherever they’re performing, but certainly not at the Frolic show.  Unfortunately, Frolic will be on hiatus until a date and location to be yet determined, but check back at the Comedy Bureau for details on the next one.

2) Forget about the N word being taken out of Mark Twain’s Huckleberry Finn and how he must be rolling in his grave LAUGHING and saying, “I told you so!” Go on tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL instead.  Persona @ Hollywood Improv 8PM $5/free for comics, The Josh & Josh Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE, Fifty First Jokes @ Zephyr Theatre 9:30PM $7 (stand-by only), How to Live with Chelsea Peretti @ UCB Theatre 9:30PM $5.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: SANDWICH SPOT 3101 Ocean Park, Santa Monica/Starts 7PM, COMEDY CRATE OPEN MIC 1061 S. La Brea, Ingelwood, CA/Sign-up 6:30PM/Starts 7PM, HOLLYWOOD HOTEL 1160 N. Vermont Ave., Los Angeles, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 7:30PM, CAFE ON 2ND 7 S. 2nd St., Alhambra, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 7:30PM, 212 CAFE 212 Pier Ave., Santa Monica, CA/Starts 9PM, MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel, past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed

4) Next Tues. Jan. 11th.  Louis CK will be dropping his upcoming album “Hilarious”.  You should go buy it.  I don’t think I can make this anymore matter-of-fact than the last two sentences except for this next one.  Just go and buy it.

5) If you suffer from not having enough Marc Maron in your smartphone like I do, there is now a WTF Podcast w/Marc Maron app available for the iPhone, iPod, and iPad that you can stream multitudes of episodes off of or even be able to call the show when it’s taping.  It’s Marc Maron for only $0.99.  You can’t really turn that down.  Really.

6) My faith in people has just been partially restored (approximately 2%) Conan O’Brien just won a People’s Choice Awards for Best Talk Show Host as you can see here. 

7) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to DAN DOMINGUEZ-“@dandomingueznow And, Lo a pale rider, on a skeletal horse, and Hell followed with him, and behind Hell: Incredible savings! Over 30% off on all housewares!”  Dan not only cheats the edges of absurdity with his comedy, but comprises one third of the force that is the Biggest Mistake Podcast (other 2/3 is Paul Jay and Jen Goldberg) and a major part of the “manly as f” site manosterone.com.  Check back at the Comedy Bureau for show dates as you don’t want to miss whatever Dan is going to say next.  Website. Twitter.

8) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Richard Pryor on Love

9) Donate to the Comedy Bureau. This is day 4 without food, and by food, I mean sanity…. Also, day 4 is really day 78.

10) Only other that is stupider than asking to be heckled on stage is telling a crowd that they don’t deserve you and then stay silent for the rest of your 5 minutes.

Report 00076

THE COMEDY BUREAU

Post Brunch Update 1/6/11

January 6, 2011
Uncategorized
212 cafe, asterios kokkinos, bar lubitsch, brent weinbach, cafe on 2nd, comedy, comedy bureau, comedy crate, comedy crawl, eddie pepitone, far bar, fifty first jokes, frolic, hollywood hotel, how to live with chelsea peretti, improv, inglewood, josh and josh show, josh rencher, kyle kinane, la, marty's, melissa villaseñor, open mic run, persona, sandwich spot, santa monica, west hollywood, zach sherwin, zephyr

1) It’s simply not enough to say that Frolic @ Far Bar is just a great show with a fantastic line-up of comics (which it is).  With live comedy, running over 90 minutes, in my opinion, one enters extremely tricky territory as the audience tires, settles their check, and checks any pertinent e-mail/texts.  Yet producer/comic Josh Rencher

put together such a tightly-run show with a plethora of great comics (who are so funny that it doesn’t matter that they have “credits” even though they all do) comprising what could be four different amazing shows on their own that I was able to sit and watch and laugh with the packed room throughout for the entire duration (approximately 2 hours).  As host (and as cliché as this sounds, it’s true) with the most Asterios Kokkinos said, “There’s no fat on this show.”  Within one of the parts of LA that actually looks like a city and has the type of nightlife where people actually WALK around, Little Tokyo, the hip, though very retro Far Bar offered Rencher’s Frolic! that very intimate setting that live comedy demands to work.  Thus I simply enjoyed a night of some of my absolute favorites comics in LA that are regularly featured here at the Comedy Bureau and more: Host Asterios Kokkinos,

Brent Weinbach,

Zach Sherwin,

Kyle Kinane,

Melissa Villaseñor,

and Eddie Pepitone.

None of those people should be missed wherever they’re performing, but certainly not at the Frolic show.  Unfortunately, Frolic will be on hiatus until a date and location to be yet determined, but check back at the Comedy Bureau for details on the next one.

2) Forget about the N word being taken out of Mark Twain’s Huckleberry Finn and how he must be rolling in his grave LAUGHING and saying, “I told you so!” Go on tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL instead.  Persona @ Hollywood Improv 8PM $5/free for comics, The Josh & Josh Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE, Fifty First Jokes @ Zephyr Theatre 9:30PM $7 (stand-by only), How to Live with Chelsea Peretti @ UCB Theatre 9:30PM $5.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: SANDWICH SPOT 3101 Ocean Park, Santa Monica/Starts 7PM, COMEDY CRATE OPEN MIC 1061 S. La Brea, Ingelwood, CA/Sign-up 6:30PM/Starts 7PM, HOLLYWOOD HOTEL 1160 N. Vermont Ave., Los Angeles, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 7:30PM, CAFE ON 2ND 7 S. 2nd St., Alhambra, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 7:30PM, 212 CAFE 212 Pier Ave., Santa Monica, CA/Starts 9PM, MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel, past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed

4) Next Tues. Jan. 11th.  Louis CK will be dropping his upcoming album “Hilarious”.  You should go buy it.  I don’t think I can make this anymore matter-of-fact than the last two sentences except for this next one.  Just go and buy it.

5) If you suffer from not having enough Marc Maron in your smartphone like I do, there is now a WTF Podcast w/Marc Maron app available for the iPhone, iPod, and iPad that you can stream multitudes of episodes off of or even be able to call the show when it’s taping.  It’s Marc Maron for only $0.99.  You can’t really turn that down.  Really.

6) My faith in people has just been partially restored (approximately 2%) Conan O’Brien just won a People’s Choice Awards for Best Talk Show Host as you can see here. 

7) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to DAN DOMINGUEZ-“@dandomingueznow And, Lo a pale rider, on a skeletal horse, and Hell followed with him, and behind Hell: Incredible savings! Over 30% off on all housewares!”  Dan not only cheats the edges of absurdity with his comedy, but comprises one third of the force that is the Biggest Mistake Podcast (other 2/3 is Paul Jay and Jen Goldberg) and a major part of the “manly as f” site manosterone.com.  Check back at the Comedy Bureau for show dates as you don’t want to miss whatever Dan is going to say next.  Website. Twitter.

8) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Richard Pryor on Love

9) Donate to the Comedy Bureau. This is day 4 without food, and by food, I mean sanity…. Also, day 4 is really day 78.

10) Only other that is stupider than asking to be heckled on stage is telling a crowd that they don’t deserve you and then stay silent for the rest of your 5 minutes.

Report 00073

THE COMEDY BUREAU

Morning Debriefing 1/4/11

January 4, 2011
Uncategorized
altadena, amuse and abuse, back home in laihaina, bar lubitsch, big trouble in little tokyo, Chatroulette live, coffee gallery, comedy, comedy bureau, comedy central, comedy crawl, comedy death ray, downtown, downtown independent, harlem place cafe, holy fuck, jokes.com, la, marty's, open mic run, palms, pasadena, patton oswalt, Señor Fish, speakeasy open mic, stand up showdown, ucb, west hollywood, westwood brewco, zombie spaceship wasteland

1) Within the realm of the open mics, I’ve found the “mixed mic” to be the best type to actually try out material. Speakeasy Open Mic @ Harlem Place Cafe on Mondays is a perfect example of that as their “mixed mic” brings all sorts of poets, musicians, and comedians such as myself all to one place to share.  Instead of falling victim to being a horrid doldrum to be “subjected to’, as many open mics have come to be, the "mixed mic” in general has enough variety in forms of artistic expression that the audience’s attention doesn’t tire out.  At Harlem Place Cafe, there were over 40 people comprised of several spoken word poets (some were actually pretty good, a rare thing at open mics), musicians, and the one comedian for the evening, myself.  Though transitioning from heavy-handed intended-to-be-life-affirming spoken word poetry to comedy can be quite tricky, people, for the most part, were willing listeners and as a result I had a pretty good set and more importantly, fun, as opposed to the typical obsessing over the response of group of self-centered comics on a weekday night.  Thus, Speakeasy Open Mic is another “Bureau Approved” open mic.  Speakeasy Open Mic takes place every Mon. at 8PM at the Harlem Place Cafe 124 W. 4th St. in Downtown Los Angeles (in alley between Spring and Main St.).  To guarantee a spot (it does get pretty crowded), sign up in advance via e-mail at speakeasyopenmic@gmail.com.

2) What a COMEDY CRAWL for tonight that you shouldn’t miss with some of the best shows in time at what is for me affordable (FREE) and for others a ridiculously great deal: Comedy Death Ray @ UCB Theatre 8:30PM $5 (stand by only), Holy Fuck @ Downtown Independent Theater 9PM FREE, Chatroulette LIVE! @ UCB Theatre 11PM $5, Dog & Pony Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8PM FREE, Amuse and Abuse @ Esquire Bar & Lounge 1 Year Anniversary 8:30PM FREE.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: PALMS 8572 Santa Monica Blvd., West Hollywood, CA/Sign-up 4:30PM/Starts 5PM, BACK HOME IN LAHAINA (call 310 835 4014 before going) 519 E. Carson St., Carson, CA #A/Sign-up 6PM/Starts 7PM/must work clean, BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE TOKYO @ SEÑOR FISH 422 E. 1st St., Los Angeles, CA (little tokyo, near downtown)/Sign-up 6:30PM/Starts 7PM, WESTWOOD BREWCO 1097 Glendon Ave., Westwood, CA/Sign-up lottery 7:30PM/Starts 8PM, COFFEE GALLERY 2029 Lake Ave., Altadena, CA/Starts 8PM/mixed mic, MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed.

4) Comedy Central is now having their annual “Stand Up Showdown” for 2011, which puts the power of what Comedy Central Presents Special are the best, and, hopefully, which ones will be aired more frequently.  You can vote here.  I’m going to watch clips from every comedian and give you my recommendations tomorrow, but, in the meantime, don’t waste your vote impulsively.  Pick someone who featured on the Comedy Bureau frequently.

5) Patton Oswalt takes a foray into the literary by making “Zombie Spaceship Wasteland” available for purchase today.  Judd Apatow claims, “Further proof that Patton Oswalt is way funnier than I am, which is either high praise or an insult. Your call.” and award winning writer Dave Eggers says, “Fans of Patton Oswalt’s standup comedy have always known he was a born writer at heart, and now here’s the proof. This is a surprisingly affecting, sincere and daresay vulnerable collection of essays, all keenly observed, always very funny.”  Maybe, at the very least, you should go to Barnes & Noble and sit for a few hours and check it out, like I plan to do.

6) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to WENDY LIEBMAN "@WendyLiebman I want to watch OWN but a) I can’t find it and b) I’m too busy texting in my car.“  Over 20 years in comedy, Wendy has built up nearly hit all the milestones that many of us in the "aspiring” category dream to achieve: touring constantly, having a special on HBO, actually making money at comedy, etc.  Being one of the quickest, wittiest, and most clever comics I’ve ever heard is what has gotten her well-deserved success.  Website, Twitter, and check back at the Comedy Bureau for any of Wendy’s upcoming LA tour dates.

7) From the You Should Have Been There Lagoon: (to show you what I’m talkin’ bout) Wendy Liebman Pt. 1 & Pt. 2

8) Donate to the Comedy Bureau. Thanks to Jerry Brandt for being a continued supporter of the Comedy Bureau.  Join him in being a good, decent person.

9) Can’t wait for all the people who have a New Year’s Resolution of trying their hand stand up comedy.  I JUST CAN’T WAIT.

Report 00074

THE COMEDY BUREAU

Morning Debriefing 1/4/11

January 4, 2011
Uncategorized
altadena, amuse and abuse, back home in laihaina, bar lubitsch, big trouble in little tokyo, Chatroulette live, coffee gallery, comedy, comedy bureau, comedy central, comedy crawl, comedy death ray, downtown, downtown independent, harlem place cafe, holy fuck, jokes.com, la, marty's, open mic run, palms, pasadena, patton oswalt, Señor Fish, speakeasy open mic, stand up showdown, ucb, west hollywood, westwood brewco, zombie spaceship wasteland

1) Within the realm of the open mics, I’ve found the “mixed mic” to be the best type to actually try out material. Speakeasy Open Mic @ Harlem Place Cafe on Mondays is a perfect example of that as their “mixed mic” brings all sorts of poets, musicians, and comedians such as myself all to one place to share.  Instead of falling victim to being a horrid doldrum to be “subjected to’, as many open mics have come to be, the "mixed mic” in general has enough variety in forms of artistic expression that the audience’s attention doesn’t tire out.  At Harlem Place Cafe, there were over 40 people comprised of several spoken word poets (some were actually pretty good, a rare thing at open mics), musicians, and the one comedian for the evening, myself.  Though transitioning from heavy-handed intended-to-be-life-affirming spoken word poetry to comedy can be quite tricky, people, for the most part, were willing listeners and as a result I had a pretty good set and more importantly, fun, as opposed to the typical obsessing over the response of group of self-centered comics on a weekday night.  Thus, Speakeasy Open Mic is another “Bureau Approved” open mic.  Speakeasy Open Mic takes place every Mon. at 8PM at the Harlem Place Cafe 124 W. 4th St. in Downtown Los Angeles (in alley between Spring and Main St.).  To guarantee a spot (it does get pretty crowded), sign up in advance via e-mail at speakeasyopenmic@gmail.com.

2) What a COMEDY CRAWL for tonight that you shouldn’t miss with some of the best shows in time at what is for me affordable (FREE) and for others a ridiculously great deal: Comedy Death Ray @ UCB Theatre 8:30PM $5 (stand by only), Holy Fuck @ Downtown Independent Theater 9PM FREE, Chatroulette LIVE! @ UCB Theatre 11PM $5, Dog & Pony Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8PM FREE, Amuse and Abuse @ Esquire Bar & Lounge 1 Year Anniversary 8:30PM FREE.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: PALMS 8572 Santa Monica Blvd., West Hollywood, CA/Sign-up 4:30PM/Starts 5PM, BACK HOME IN LAHAINA (call 310 835 4014 before going) 519 E. Carson St., Carson, CA #A/Sign-up 6PM/Starts 7PM/must work clean, BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE TOKYO @ SEÑOR FISH 422 E. 1st St., Los Angeles, CA (little tokyo, near downtown)/Sign-up 6:30PM/Starts 7PM, WESTWOOD BREWCO 1097 Glendon Ave., Westwood, CA/Sign-up lottery 7:30PM/Starts 8PM, COFFEE GALLERY 2029 Lake Ave., Altadena, CA/Starts 8PM/mixed mic, MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed.

4) Comedy Central is now having their annual “Stand Up Showdown” for 2011, which puts the power of what Comedy Central Presents Special are the best, and, hopefully, which ones will be aired more frequently.  You can vote here.  I’m going to watch clips from every comedian and give you my recommendations tomorrow, but, in the meantime, don’t waste your vote impulsively.  Pick someone who featured on the Comedy Bureau frequently.

5) Patton Oswalt takes a foray into the literary by making “Zombie Spaceship Wasteland” available for purchase today.  Judd Apatow claims, “Further proof that Patton Oswalt is way funnier than I am, which is either high praise or an insult. Your call.” and award winning writer Dave Eggers says, “Fans of Patton Oswalt’s standup comedy have always known he was a born writer at heart, and now here’s the proof. This is a surprisingly affecting, sincere and daresay vulnerable collection of essays, all keenly observed, always very funny.”  Maybe, at the very least, you should go to Barnes & Noble and sit for a few hours and check it out, like I plan to do.

6) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to WENDY LIEBMAN "@WendyLiebman I want to watch OWN but a) I can’t find it and b) I’m too busy texting in my car.“  Over 20 years in comedy, Wendy has built up nearly hit all the milestones that many of us in the "aspiring” category dream to achieve: touring constantly, having a special on HBO, actually making money at comedy, etc.  Being one of the quickest, wittiest, and most clever comics I’ve ever heard is what has gotten her well-deserved success.  Website, Twitter, and check back at the Comedy Bureau for any of Wendy’s upcoming LA tour dates.

7) From the You Should Have Been There Lagoon: (to show you what I’m talkin’ bout) Wendy Liebman Pt. 1 & Pt. 2

8) Donate to the Comedy Bureau. Thanks to Jerry Brandt for being a continued supporter of the Comedy Bureau.  Join him in being a good, decent person.

9) Can’t wait for all the people who have a New Year’s Resolution of trying their hand stand up comedy.  I JUST CAN’T WAIT.

Report 00071

THE COMEDY BUREAU

Morning Debriefing 12/30/10

December 30, 2010
Uncategorized
15th annual comedy countdown, bar lubitsch, bill hicks, blitzkroeger, charlyne yi, christian pazitsky, comedy bureau, comedy crawl, donate, greater la open mic map, hollywood, hollywood improv, I know what you're thinking... (no you don't), jon lovitz comedy club, josh and josh show, la, laurie kilmartin, marty's, morning debriefing, nick thune, sal's comedy hole, the comedy store, the sklar brothers, this comedy show, ucb, universal city, west hollywood, will weldon

1) Now for the start of “I Know What You’re Thinking… (No, You Don’t)”, an ongoing series into the psyche of a comedian (me/The Comedy Bureau Director/@blitzkroeger) after a night of comedy in LA—SURE, there were plenty of great shows as “confirmed” by the wondrous updates via my facebook feed that I could have attended last night, but instead, I chose to throw myself back into the pit/den of lions of trying out new material. Over the last week and a half, I’ve tightened my “holidays” material to the point of ad nauseam and decided to get back to work on deconstructing the norms and mores of dating in our times that mostly involves me getting “I’ll be right back” and “You’re too nice.” “You’re such a great guy” is another really popular one. In this spirit, I wrote out a brand new 7 minutes revolving around that topic. Actually, “grossly spat out whilst reading Twitter” would be a more accurate description of what was created. At the open mic, I nearly forgot half of it, remembering mostly just the punchlines and hardly any of the set-ups, transitions, intros, premises, etc. and it was met with the long bouts of silence and false sympathy from the “green” comic in the room who still doesn’t shut up during people’s sets that it deserved. In short, my set was mostly garbage and yet, I felt like it was needed. In being a comedian, as much as I strive to smash the place when I go up, I sincerely believe that a “humbling” set is needed every once in a while to let you know that you’re human and not comedy incarnate (For the record: I have NEVER thought I was comedy incarnate). Still, as honest you have to be with yourself when being an artist developing his or her art, you also have to lift yourself up and try to take something, anything from any performance, which, in this case, was about 5 or 6 lines that worked and actually got laughs the way I wanted despite me rambling them out of my mouth in an almost incoherent, depression-ridden fashion. Tune in next time at the Comedy Bureau to see where those 5 or 6 lines actually go…. or if I just lose it altogether.

2) I don’t have a New Year’s Resolution because it’s just another week on the calendar, just like tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL is another damn fine night of laughter. Start with The 2010 It Sucked Awards @ UCB Theatre 8PM $5 (stand-by only), then go to T’was the Night Before New Year’s Eve @ Hollywood Improv 8PM $14/2 item min., then go to This Comedy Show @ the Jon Lovitz Club 8PM $20/2 drink min./$3 valet parking special, and finish with The Josh & Josh Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/one item min., MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed

4) The Greater LA Open Mic Map will be very soon updated with whole new round of open mics for the new year for everyone to try their new year’s resolution material at. Check back at the Comedy Bureau very soon for updates.

5) Though this might sound traitorous, especially since the Comedy Bureau is LA based, if you have New Year’s Eve plans to see a comedy show, LEAVE LA!!! The best New Year’s Eve comedy event will actually be taking place in San Francisco at the Palace of Fine Arts. The 15th Annual Comedy Countdown Dec. 31st 9:30PM will feature the likes of Laurie Kilmartin, Nick Thune, Charlyne Yi, Christina Pazitsky, the Sklar Brothers, and many more. Tickets range from $60 to $114, which is why I’m completely fine with going to a party and donating a few bucks for a keg back here in LA.

6) thecomedystore replied to your post: Morning Debriefing 12/29/10-Y U no Love? Two quick answers: 1) In doing the Comedy Bureau, I’m also a comic whose slowly, but surely growing incapable of the act of love. 2) I hate when people write like preschoolers attempting to draw and color. MORE TO COME SOON. VERY SOON.

7) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to WILL WELDON: “@oldmanweldon To raise awareness about violence against women I tell every guy in Ed Hardy that they probably hit women.” Hailing from Canada, Will has brought has sharpened observations to LA where have they been welcomed certainly by the Comedy Bureau and many others in LA comedy circles. Hopefully, we can make those circles aware of Will’s hilarity increase in size and/or number. All of you good folks reading this can actually see Will at What’s Up Tiger Lily @ Hollywood Studio Bar & Grill Mon. Jan 3rd, 8PM FREE and Fifty First Jokes @ The Zephyr Theater Thurs. Jan. 6th 9PM $7. Also, don’t miss his website, Twitter, or blog.

8) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Bill Hicks Banned Set on Letterman

9) Donate to the Comedy Bureau… Tron made enough money, OK? Spread the wealth.

10) The rain has stoppped…. The skies are clear…. You can even see the mountains in the distance that you never knew existed… AND I STILL CAN’T GET THAT NEW 7 MINUTES ON HOMEWRECKING TO WORK!!!

Report 00069

THE COMEDY BUREAU

Morning Debriefing 12/30/10

December 30, 2010
Uncategorized
15th annual comedy countdown, bar lubitsch, bill hicks, blitzkroeger, charlyne yi, christian pazitsky, comedy bureau, comedy crawl, donate, greater la open mic map, hollywood, hollywood improv, I know what you're thinking... (no you don't), jon lovitz comedy club, josh and josh show, la, laurie kilmartin, marty's, nick thune, sal's comedy hole, the comedy store, the sklar brothers, this comedy show, ucb, universal city, west hollywood, will weldon

1) Now for the start of “I Know What You’re Thinking… (No, You Don’t)”, an ongoing series into the psyche of a comedian (me/The Comedy Bureau Director/@blitzkroeger) after a night of comedy in LA—SURE, there were plenty of great shows as “confirmed” by the wondrous updates via my facebook feed that I could have attended last night, but instead, I chose to throw myself back into the pit/den of lions of trying out new material.  Over the last week and a half, I’ve tightened my “holidays” material to the point of ad nauseam and decided to get back to work on deconstructing the norms and mores of dating in our times that mostly involves me getting “I’ll be right back” and “You’re too nice.”  "You’re such a great guy" is another really popular one.  In this spirit, I wrote out a brand new 7 minutes revolving around that topic.  Actually, “grossly spat out whilst reading Twitter” would be a more accurate description of what was created.  At the open mic, I nearly forgot half of it, remembering mostly just the punchlines and hardly any of the set-ups, transitions, intros, premises, etc. and it was met with the long bouts of silence and false sympathy from the “green” comic in the room who still doesn’t shut up during people’s sets that it deserved.  In short, my set was mostly garbage and yet, I felt like it was needed.  In being a comedian, as much as I strive to smash the place when I go up, I sincerely believe that a “humbling” set is needed every once in a while to let you know that you’re human and not comedy incarnate (For the record: I have NEVER thought I was comedy incarnate).  Still, as honest you have to be with yourself when being an artist developing his or her art, you also have to lift yourself up and try to take something, anything from any performance, which, in this case, was about 5 or 6 lines that worked and actually got laughs the way I wanted despite me rambling them out of my mouth in an almost incoherent, depression-ridden fashion.  Tune in next time at the Comedy Bureau to see where those 5 or 6 lines actually go…. or if I just lose it altogether.

2) I don’t have a New Year’s Resolution because it’s just another week on the calendar, just like tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL is another damn fine night of laughter.  Start with The 2010 It Sucked Awards @ UCB Theatre 8PM $5 (stand-by only), then go to T’was the Night Before New Year’s Eve @ Hollywood Improv 8PM $14/2 item min., then go to This Comedy Show @ the Jon Lovitz Club 8PM $20/2 drink min./$3 valet parking special, and finish with The Josh & Josh Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/one item min., MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed

4) The Greater LA Open Mic Map will be very soon updated with whole new round of open mics for the new year for everyone to try their new year’s resolution material at.  Check back at the Comedy Bureau very soon for updates.

5) Though this might sound traitorous, especially since the Comedy Bureau is LA based, if you have New Year’s Eve plans to see a comedy show, LEAVE LA!!!  The best New Year’s Eve comedy event will actually be taking place in San Francisco at the Palace of Fine Arts.  The 15th Annual Comedy Countdown Dec. 31st 9:30PM will feature the likes of Laurie Kilmartin, Nick Thune, Charlyne Yi, Christina Pazitsky, the Sklar Brothers, and many more.  Tickets range from $60 to $114, which is why I’m completely fine with going to a party and donating a few bucks for a keg back here in LA.

6) thecomedystore replied to your post: Morning Debriefing 12/29/10-Y U no Love? Two quick answers:  1) In doing the Comedy Bureau, I’m also a comic whose slowly, but surely growing incapable of the act of love. 2) I hate when people write like preschooler’s attempt to draw and color.  MORE TO COME SOON. VERY SOON.

7) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to WILL WELDON: “@oldmanweldon To raise awareness about violence against women I tell every guy in Ed Hardy that they probably hit women.”  Hailing from Canada, Will has brought has sharpened observations to LA where have they been welcomed certainly by the Comedy Bureau and many others in LA comedy circles.  Hopefully, we can make those circles aware of Will’s hilarity increase in size and/or number.  All of you good folks reading this can actually see Will at What’s Up Tiger Lily @ Hollywood Studio Bar & Grill Mon. Jan 3rd, 8PM FREE and Fifty First Jokes @ The Zephyr Theater Thurs. Jan. 6th 9PM $7.  Also, don’t miss his website, Twitter, or blog.

8) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Bill Hicks Banned Set on Letterman

9) Donate to the Comedy Bureau…  Tron made enough money, OK?  Spread the wealth.

10) The rain has stoppped…. The skies are clear…. You can even see the mountains in the distance that you never knew existed… AND I STILL CAN’T THAT NEW 7 MINUTES 

Report 00064

THE COMEDY BUREAU

Morning Debriefing 12/24/10

December 24, 2010
Uncategorized
Adam Shenkman, bar lubitsch, breakfast show, comedy bureau, conan, donate, heebonism, james adomian, josh and josh show, la, lizzy cooperman, morning debriefing, palms casino, paulie shore, reggie watts, star wars holiday special, ultimate free and cheap la comedy list, vegas is my oyster, west hollywood, wisepix

1) On the Eve of Christmas Eve, on a night that most people are merely waiting for the rise of Christmas Morning, one, James Adomian, brought on one of the best LA stand up comedy performances of the year at the Josh and Josh Show.  I write this without any hesitation at all even though I have seen an average of four hours of live stand up virtually every night for the last several months.  Before Adomian went on tour for the last few months, I had seen him do versions of his act at least 10 times or to the point where I could write his set list out for him, but even in knowing what was coming, Adomian transcended all of my expectations with his superb impressions and uncanny awareness as a performer on stage.  Last night, at Bar Lubitsch, Adomian got the audience, me included, to a point that’s so rare, not just in comedy, but in all art forms, where the audience member/viewer/reader/listener/etc. actually forgets that they are actually voluntarily consuming a performance or a piece.  For me, as a comic, I especially enjoyed seeing Adomian deal with these two girls who were erupting in laughter, then found one joke somewhat to their distaste, then instantly get them back on his side.  In fact, they were personally praising James for a good 15 minutes after the show.  From his observations on gay villains, Sam Elliot advertising Kombucha, to his own “show-biz” story opening for Joan Rivers, Adomian made the term “tour-de-force” seem inadequate in this attempt to describe his performance.  As highly respected comedienne/Comedy Bureau favorite Lizzy Cooperman said, “We all have just witnessed something [that we’re privileged to be a part of].”  As James Adomian is back in LA for the time being, please check back at the Comedy Bureau for his next performance.

2) Tonight, there will be no COMEDY CRAWL as this time of year, I sincerely believe that is should be spent with your friends and family.  Also, there’s really nothing else going on.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: "Yeah, I’m gonna go do an open mic on Christmas Eve.  Gonna work on my five minutes for this Hollywood Showcase I’m gonna be in.  It’s gonna be great.  There’s going to be industry there, but, uhhh, do you want to go?  I need to bring five people“-Person who wants to do an open mic on Christmas Eve/Escaped Mental Ward Patient.  TO ALL YOU HARD WORKING COMICS OUT THERE, ENJOY YOURSELVES FOR A DAY OR TWO, WHY DON’T YOU?

4) Reggie Watts had a "Holidays” message for everyone on Conan last night, here it is, in case you missed it.

5) WHO HAS TWO THUMBS AND WANTS TO OPEN FOR PAULIE SHORE IN VEGAS?  Anyone?  If you are one of those people, Paulie Shore is holding an open online-submission contest to “warm-up” for his show “Vegas is My Oyster” in Vegas with the likes of Charlyne Yi, Bobby Lee, and himself at the Palms Casino.  Contest ends Dec. 30th. More details and submissions here.

6) The Ultimate Free & Cheap LA Comedy List 12/26/10-1/1/10.  Thanks Wisepix.

6) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to ADAM SHENKMAN-“Looking for a Wife-FIRST DATE-Episode #5”  Adam Shenkman has drawn several comparisons to Andy Kaufman and deservingly so with his absolute, unwavering commitment to whatever he is doing both on and off stage.  He’ll be continuing his “Looking for a Wife” series TONIGHT 9PM for FREE in Palm Springs at the Ace Hotel as part of his “Heebonism Christmas Eve Comedy Night”.  Though he’s an act not to be missed, Shenkman with all his wild, unexpected antics is an act that’s really hard to miss as he runs a comedy variety show for kids called “The Breakfast Show”.  Check at Adam’s website or back at the Comedy Bureau for details on the next one.  

7) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Star Wars Holiday Special Part 1 (there are 14-other successive parts on Youtube)

8) Donate to the Comedy Bureau, especially if you had no idea that there was a Star Wars Holiday Special that George Lucas himself doesn’t even like admitting that he let happen.

9) Last night, a girl said the following to me in conversation: Are you funny?  I’m not getting funny from you.  I was not aware that there was a “funny” detector available to the general public.  If anyone knows of one, in, perhaps, a secret section of Brookstone/Skymall, please e-mail thecomedybureau@gmail.com with details.  Also, if anyone knows of a handheld particle cannon that can vaporize an entire person with one shot, that would be helpful too.

Report 00063

THE COMEDY BUREAU

Morning Debriefing 12/24/10

December 24, 2010
Uncategorized
Adam Shenkman, bar lubitsch, breakfast show, comedy bureau, conan, donate, heebonism, james adomian, josh and josh show, la, lizzy cooperman, palms casino, paulie shore, reggie watts, star wars holiday special, ultimate free and cheap la comedy list, vegas is my oyster, west hollywood, wisepix

1) On the Eve of Christmas Eve, on a night that most people are merely waiting for the rise of Christmas Morning, one, James Adomian, brought on one of the best LA stand up comedy performances of the year at the Josh and Josh Show.  I write this without any hesitation at all even though I have seen an average of four hours of live stand up virtually every night for the last several months.  Before Adomian went on tour for the last few months, I had seen him do versions of his act at least 10 times or to the point where I could write his set list out for him, but even in knowing what was coming, Adomian transcended all of my expectations with his superb impressions and uncanny awareness as a performer on stage.  Last night, at Bar Lubitsch, Adomian got the audience, me included, to a point that’s so rare, not just in comedy, but in all art forms, where the audience member/viewer/reader/listener/etc. actually forgets that they are actually voluntarily consuming a performance or a piece.  For me, as a comic, I especially enjoyed seeing Adomian deal with these two girls who were erupting in laughter, then found one joke somewhat to their distaste, then instantly get them back on his side.  In fact, they were personally praising James for a good 15 minutes after the show.  From his observations on gay villains, Sam Elliot advertising Kombucha, to his own “show-biz” story opening for Joan Rivers, Adomian made the term “tour-de-force” seem inadequate in this attempt to describe his performance.  As highly respected comedienne/Comedy Bureau favorite Lizzy Cooperman said, “We all have just witnessed something [that we’re privileged to be a part of].”  As James Adomian is back in LA for the time being, please check back at the Comedy Bureau for his next performance.

2) Tonight, there will be no COMEDY CRAWL as this time of year, I sincerely believe that is should be spent with your friends and family.  Also, there’s really nothing else going on.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: "Yeah, I’m gonna go do an open mic on Christmas Eve.  Gonna work on my five minutes for this Hollywood Showcase I’m gonna be in.  It’s gonna be great.  There’s going to be industry there, but, uhhh, do you want to go?  I need to bring five people“-Person who wants to do an open mic on Christmas Eve/Escaped Mental Ward Patient.  TO ALL YOU HARD WORKING COMICS OUT THERE, ENJOY YOURSELVES FOR A DAY OR TWO, WHY DON’T YOU?

4) Reggie Watts had a "Holidays” message for everyone on Conan last night, here it is, in case you missed it.

5) WHO HAS TWO THUMBS AND WANTS TO OPEN FOR PAULIE SHORE IN VEGAS?  Anyone?  If you are one of those people, Paulie Shore is holding an open online-submission contest to “warm-up” for his show “Vegas is My Oyster” in Vegas with the likes of Charlyne Yi, Bobby Lee, and himself at the Palms Casino.  Contest ends Dec. 30th. More details and submissions here.

6) The Ultimate Free & Cheap LA Comedy List 12/26/10-1/1/10.  Thanks Wisepix.

6) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to ADAM SHENKMAN-“Looking for a Wife-FIRST DATE-Episode #5”  Adam Shenkman has drawn several comparisons to Andy Kaufman and deservingly so with his absolute, unwavering commitment to whatever he is doing both on and off stage.  He’ll be continuing his “Looking for a Wife” series TONIGHT 9PM for FREE in Palm Springs at the Ace Hotel as part of his “Heebonism Christmas Eve Comedy Night”.  Though he’s an act not to be missed, Shenkman with all his wild, unexpected antics is an act that’s really hard to miss as he runs a comedy variety show for kids called “The Breakfast Show”.  Check at Adam’s website or back at the Comedy Bureau for details on the next one.  

7) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Star Wars Holiday Special Part 1 (there are 14-other successive parts on Youtube)

8) Donate to the Comedy Bureau, especially if you had no idea that there was a Star Wars Holiday Special that George Lucas himself doesn’t even like admitting that he let happen.

9) Last night, a girl said the following to me in conversation: Are you funny?  I’m not getting funny from you.  I was not aware that there was a “funny” detector available to the general public.  If anyone knows of one, in, perhaps, a secret section of Brookstone/Skymall, please e-mail thecomedybureau@gmail.com with details.  Also, if anyone knows of a handheld particle cannon that can vaporize an entire person with one shot, that would be helpful too.

Report 00059

THE COMEDY BUREAU

Morning Debriefing 12/23/10

December 23, 2010
Uncategorized
alhambra, bar lubitsch, cafe on 2nd, comedy, comedy bureau, comedy crawl, conan, fuck shit stack, garfunkel and oates, hollywood, josh and josh show, la, library a coffee house, long beach, marianne sierk, marty's, morning debriefing, nick petrillo, open mic run, present face, reggie watts, roast of baby jesus, sal's comedy hole, sandwich spot, santa monica, ucb, west hollywood

1) The Library: A Coffee House Open Mic serves as yet another example of what driving outside of Hollywood/LA area will get you in terms of looking for decent open mic stage time as a comic.  With a set-up resembling the living room of a standard hipster bookworm and no stage, there’s actually a sort welcoming, “at home” atmosphere that I personally find encouraging, especially in the sense that I can go into material productively as opposed to being forced to riff/do aggressive crowd work to get any sort of response.  Hosted endearingly by Nick Petrillo, all comics that come down get 7 minutes, without having to pay any sort of cover charge, and there’s usually a small, but real crowd of people that sometimes, surprisingly, knows that there’s a comedy open mic happening and sticks around to listen.  To all those not within the immediate Long Beach vicinity, if you can make it out to 3418 E. Broadway, Long Beach, CA by 8PM (sign-up is first come, first served), I highly suggest you do so as it another The Comedy Bureau has just deemed it another “Bureau Approved” open mic. 

2) I suggest that you flip a coin to decide which of the two shows that you would go to on tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL then ignore the result and just go to both of them anyway.  Go to Roast of Baby Jesus @ UCB Theatre 8PM $5 (stand-by only) and The Josh & Josh Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: CAFE ON 2ND (call 626 284-1292 before going) 7 S. 2nd St., Alhambra, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 7:30PM/$3 cover/10 min. guaranteed, SIPOLOGY (call 562 432 4800 before going) 448 E. Broadway, Long Beach, CA/Starts 8PM, MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed.

4) The rain has gone away, but if you’re just too comfy in your day bed watching youtube clips, you can stay right where you are and watch Reggie Watts on Conan at 11PM TBS OR Johnny Pemberton as host of MEGADRIVE on MTV, also at 11PM.  Though, you were probably going to watch both of those ANYWAY, right….?  Because that’s what you should be doing….

5) Garfunkel and Oates contribution to Christmas lore has been now documented and solidified with the addition of the term “present face” on urbandictionary.com: Present Face-the face you make when you get a really terrible present but don’t want to hurt anybodies feelings. EX. “I could tell martha hated the chess set i got her, you could see that present face from a mile away.”  Don’t miss the hilarious video accompaniment to this right here.  Also, if you have a “present face” that you would like to share with Garfunkel and Oates, send a picture to mypresentface@gmail.com to help make the Present Face video of 2010.

6) Punchline Magazine’s Punchlist 2010 is still open.  GO VOTE…. oh, and if you need some recommendations… here’s a few in this post.

7) As I announced several posts ago, instead of making a simple “10 best of 2010” type of list, I will one-up all other comedy websites/blogs by making a “10 BEST OF ‘best of 2010 lists’ LIST” very soon.  From nationally recognized and respected lists to one’s that some guy just made on his Tumblr, they all have been gathered and taken into consideration and are currently being sorted through at the Comedy Bureau so you don’t have to wonder which one to listen to.  Check back at the Comedy Bureau for more details.

8) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to MARIANNE SIERK-“@mrrrianne Santa came early – left me a pile of MAGIC TERMITE WINGS next to my window sill.  I must have been a very good girl.”  The lovely Marianne Sierk is quite deceptive every time she takes the stage as she has a very sweet demeanor, but crushes with her comedy, making sure she brings “the goods” every time.  Touring colleges and corporations throughout the country, Marianne should never be missed, even if you have a moderate interest in comedy or laughing in general.  Here are Marianne’s Website and Twitter.  Check back at the Comedy Bureau for details on her next LA performance.

9) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Reggie Watts-Fuck Shit Stack

10) Donate to the Comedy Bureau so I can afford a bandwagon for everyone to jump on…. so they could donate again.

11) The Comedy Bureau currently has 109 followers on twitter, 62 on tumblr, 114 on facebook, and a startling number of people who know who I am without ever having talked to me…. that number being 2.   

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Morning Debriefing 12/23/10

December 23, 2010
Uncategorized
alhambra, bar lubitsch, cafe on 2nd, comedy, comedy bureau, comedy crawl, conan, fuck shit stack, garfunkel and oates, hollywood, josh and josh show, la, library a coffee house, long beach, marianne sierk, marty's, nick petrillo, open mic run, present face, reggie watts, roast of baby jesus, sal's comedy hole, sandwich spot, santa monica, ucb, west hollywood

1) The Library: A Coffee House Open Mic serves as yet another example of what driving outside of Hollywood/LA area will get you in terms of looking for decent open mic stage time as a comic.  With a set-up resembling the living room of a standard hipster bookworm and no stage, there’s actually a sort welcoming, “at home” atmosphere that I personally find encouraging, especially in the sense that I can go into material productively as opposed to being forced to riff/do aggressive crowd work to get any sort of response.  Hosted endearingly by Nick Petrillo, all comics that come down get 7 minutes, without having to pay any sort of cover charge, and there’s usually a small, but real crowd of people that sometimes, surprisingly, knows that there’s a comedy open mic happening and sticks around to listen.  To all those not within the immediate Long Beach vicinity, if you can make it out to 3418 E. Broadway, Long Beach, CA by 8PM (sign-up is first come, first served), I highly suggest you do so as it another The Comedy Bureau has just deemed it another “Bureau Approved” open mic. 

2) I suggest that you flip a coin to decide which of the two shows that you would go to on tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL then ignore the result and just go to both of them anyway.  Go to Roast of Baby Jesus @ UCB Theatre 8PM $5 (stand-by only) and The Josh & Josh Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/one item min., CAFE ON 2ND (call 626 284-1292 before going) 7 S. 2nd St., Alhambra, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 7:30PM/$3 cover/10 min. guaranteed, SANDWICH SPOT (call 310 396-7768) 3101 Ocean Park, Santa Monica, CA/Starts 7PM, MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed.

4) The rain has gone away, but if you’re just too comfy in your day bed watching youtube clips, you can stay right where you are and watch Reggie Watts on Conan at 11PM TBS.  Though, you were probably going to watch Conan ANYWAY, right….?  Because that’s what you should be doing….

5) Garfunkel and Oates contribution to Christmas lore has been now documented and solidified with the addition of the term “present face” on urbandictionary.com: Present Face-the face you make when you get a really terrible present but don’t want to hurt anybodies feelings. EX. “I could tell martha hated the chess set i got her, you could see that present face from a mile away.”  Don’t miss the hilarious video accompaniment to this right here.  Also, if you have a “present face” that you would like to share with Garfunkel and Oates, send a picture to mypresentface@gmail.com to help make the Present Face video of 2010.

6) As I announced several posts ago, instead of making a simple “10 best of 2010” type of list, I will one-up all other comedy websites/blogs by making a “10 BEST OF ‘best of 2010 lists’ LIST” very soon.  From nationally recognized and respected lists to one’s that some guy just made on his Tumblr, they all have been gathered and taken into consideration and are currently being sorted through at the Comedy Bureau so you don’t have to wonder which one to listen to.  Check back at the Comedy Bureau for more details.

7) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to MARIANNE SIERK-“@mrrrianne Santa came early – left me a pile of MAGIC TERMITE WINGS next to my window sill.  I must have been a very good girl.”  The lovely Marianne Sierk is quite deceptive every time she takes the stage as she has a very sweet demeanor, but crushes with her comedy, making sure she brings “the goods” every time.  Touring colleges and corporations throughout the country, Marianne should never be missed, even if you have a moderate interest in comedy or laughing in general.  Here are Marianne’s Website and Twitter.  Check back at the Comedy Bureau for details on her next LA performance.

8) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Reggie Watts-Fuck Shit Stack

9) Donate to the Comedy Bureau so I can afford a bandwagon for everyone to jump on…. so they could donate again.

10) The Comedy Bureau currently has 109 followers on twitter, 62 on tumblr, 114 on facebook, and a startling number of people who know who I am without ever having talked to me…. that number being 2.   

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Morning Debriefing 12/22/10

December 22, 2010
Uncategorized
alhambra, aparna nancherla, bar lubitsch, big trouble in little tokyo, cafe on 2nd, christmas conspiracy, comedy bureau, ed galvez's punk house, greg proops, hollywood, improv, irvine, la, last call comedy, library a coffee house, long beach, marianne sierk, marty's, matt knudsen, npr, ontario improv, sal's comedy hole, santa monica, Señor Fish, smartest man in the world, thai rivera, tony sam, ucb, west hollywood, westside comedy theatre

1) BIG THANKS to EVERYONE who made it out to BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE TOKYO @ SEÑOR FISH last night despite government issued warning of flash floods in the downtown LA area.  Dedication and support like this is what makes “real people” say that this OPEN MIC is better than comedy clubs in the OC (claim from an audience member who didn’t know that there was comedy and stuck around until the end of the show).  Special thanks once again to MARIANNE SIERK working her magic just like she does on decaf coffee. NEXT WEEK: PART 8 w/TONY SAM!!! AND MATT KNUDSEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2) Three days until Christmas and I’m still short on gifts.  I’m going to do/see comedy about that instead of alleviating the problem and so should you.  Tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL features Christmas Conspiracy @ UCB Theatre 8PM $5, Greg Proops’ Smartest Man in the World LIVE @ Bar Lubitsch FREE 8PM, Last Call Comedy @ Irvine Improv $15/2 item min., Thai Rivera @ Ontario Improv 8PM $10/2 item min., and Ed Galvez’s Punk House @ Westside Comedy Theatre 9PM $8, then go buy gifts at Rite-Aid because they’ll be open.  And cheap.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: LIBRARY A COFFEEHOUSE 3418 E. Broadway, Long Beach, CA/Sign-up 8PM/Starts 8:30PM, CAFE ON 2ND (call 626 284-1292 before going) 7 S. 2nd St., Alhambra, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 7:30PM/$3 cover/10 min., SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM/one item min., MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed.

4) One of the cleverest comics I know in Los Angeles, Aparna Nancherla, was recently interviewed on NPR.  Though, the title of the post reads, “Rookie Comedienne Likes Her Chances in LA”, Aparna has a wit and mastery of word play that is deserving of being featured on NPR, which you should check out here.

5) One night, a drifter randomly called out to me, “Yo ASSWIPE!! You got any weed?” as I was walking to my car and, for whatever reason, I wish Larry David was there, not instead of me, but with me, so I could witness his brilliance in action.  Here’s a bit of it as Larry David contributes to the NY Times w/ “Thanks for the Tax Cut”.  

6) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to ALISON AGOSTI: “@Just_Alison If you’re shopping at Brookstone for a last-minute gift, just don’t get that person anything.  You obviously hate them.”  "Former" podcaster that several people in the LA comedy community wish to resume her podcast “Live From a Shoebox”, Alison Agosti, though I’ve never personally had the pleasure of meeting her, has quite the delightfully dark sense of humor on Twitter that’s a joy to read everyday.  Check back at the Comedy Bureau for details on if she resumes her podcasting duties and absolutely follow her on Twitter and/or her blog.

7) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Ultimate 11 Worst Open Mic Comics-Weird Comic

8) I know that there’s a lot of people that are offering support to Biggest Mistake’s Jen Goldberg’s predicament in her “chipwich debt” to comedian Asterios Kokkinos, but if you have any surplus “support” in the form of donations from helping them out, the Comedy Bureau would greatly appreciate it being sent our way.

9) There is something significant to be said of the “jaded” quotient here in Los Angeles as many comics have moved on to New Year’s Resolution material only three days away from Christmas.  

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Morning Debriefing 12/16/10

December 16, 2010
Uncategorized
212 cafe, 2nd annual best doorknockers christmas pageant ever, 4/20, adam carolla, all star lanes, bar lubitsch, bill burr, brea, charlyne yi, comedy bureau, comedy crate, comedy crawl, comedy speakeasy, comedy store, comedy90210, comics and comics, culver city, downtown, eagle rock, flappers claremont, hollywood, hollywood hotel, improv, ingelwood, irvine, jimmy dore, josh and josh show, meltdown comics, SmashBox Studios, steve allen theater

1) Apparently, enough people read this blog in the LA comedy community so that The World Famous Comedy Store has taken notice.

 
The last time I heard anything from anybody at the Comedy Store was a couple a months ago when someone asked me, “Can you bring 5 people?”  I’m glad that writing ABOUT comedy as opposed to writing and performing comedy, which I still voraciously commit myself to daily/nightly, is getting me somewhere.  Thanks to all who read and there will be a night that I go to the Comedy Store/Improv/Ice House/etc. after I get some cash from Christmas “returns” and I’ll be pleasantly surprised if anybody knows who I am.

2) Yeah, there’s 12 shows on this list.  Can I make it to all of them?  Of course I can and so should you (STOP WORKING OUT THE “MOVIE PHYSICS” IN YOUR HEAD!!!) Tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL includes The Super Serious Show @ Smashbox Studios 7PM $18, Crisis on Infinite Comics and Comics 3-yr. Anniversary @ Meltdown Comics 7PM $5, Charlyne Yi @ UCB Theatre 8PM $5, Subversive Comedy w/Jimmy Dore & Friends @ Flappers Claremont 8PM $12/2 drink min., Comedy90210 @ Roxybury Cafe 8PM $5, 4 & 20 @ All Star Lanes 8PM FREE, Adam Carolla @ Irvine Improv 8PM $30/2 drink min., 2nd Annual Best Doorknockers Christmas Pageant Ever!!! @ Steve Allen Theater 8PM $10/Two-for-one $5 each, Comedy Speakeasy @ TSR Lounge 8PM FREE, Bill Burr @ Brea Improv 8PM $17/2 drink min., The Produce Section Show @ 767 Central Ave., Los Angeles, CA (downtown) 8PM FREE (say “produce section” to doorman to get in), and certainly the last, but not least by any stretch of the imagination The Josh and Josh Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE.  Not that bad, right?

3) OPEN MIC RUN: SANDWICH SPOT 3101 Ocean Park, Santa Monica, CA/Starts 7PM, COMEDY CRATE 1061 S. La Brea, Inglewood, CA/Starts 7PM, HOLLYWOOD HOTEL 1160 N. Vermont Ave., Los Angeles, CA/Starts 7PM, CAFE ON 2ND 7 S. 2nd St., Alhambra, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 7:30PM/$3 cover/10 min., SIPOLOGY 448 E. Broadway, Long Beach, CA/Sign-up 7:30PM/Starts 8PM, TKO SHOW @ 212 CAFE 212 Pier Ave., Santa Monica, CA/Starts 9PM, MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed.

4) Staying in because you have become it’s no longer slightly breezy at 70? Watch Johnny Pemberton on MTV’s Megadrive 11PM or Matt Braunger on E!’s Chelsea Lately also at 11PM because you will something actually or verbally destroyed.

5) There are actually more open mics that happen than what I list daily above in the “OPEN MIC RUN” feature.  That rundown basically lists what I think is worth your time on a nightly basis, more or less (i.e. you won’t want to entirely quit comedy after doing those rooms).  For an even more comprehensive listing, go to the Greater LA Open Mic Map, which lists every open mic I know of (constantly updated).

6) Maria Bamford’s One-Hour Homemade Christmas Special! FREE! RIGHT HERE! FROM THE COMFORT OF THE VERY POSITION THAT YOU’RE SITTING IN!!!

7) For the Comedy Bureau “Tip of the Hat”, I follow over 300 people on Twitter, am friends with over 300 comics on Facebook, and follow over 80 people on Tumblr, ALL OF WHICH IS READ BY ME (that does indeed me I read every f’n tweet/blog of every person I follow).  This is why I’m severely curtailing following more people on Twitter and Tumblr to keep my sanity.  However, if you want to be considered for the “Tip of the Hat”, you can make my life infinitely easier by submitting a status update/tweet/quote/blog post/joke/video/picture that you took/etc. to thecomedybureau@gmail.com with your name, “FYC Tip of the Hat”, and the date in the subject line.  Speaking of which…

8) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to DAVE ROSS-“@davetotheross honestly ladies, a side-hug might as well be a fork in the eye.”  Dave Ross joins the “Tip of the Hat x 2 Club” here and deservedly so with his dominating and hilarious online presence (Dave’s Cats and Pussy Podcast was nominated by Punchline Magazine as one of the Best New Podcasts of 2010) and his show Holy Fuck!, one of my favorites about town.  So… check out Dave’s fantastic website and follow him on Twitter and don’t miss the next edition of Holy Fuck! next Tuesday Dec. 21st at the Downtown Independent Theatre for completely fucking FREE!!!

9) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Bill Hicks on Marketing (RIP Bill Hicks… Dec. 16th was his birthday)

10) “Build it and they will donate.”-Cheap attempt #23 to get people to donate to the Comedy Bureau.  

11) TONIGHT: LIVE TWEETING at a Run of Shows OR Open Mics—-follow here to find out where my comedy misadventures take me tonight. (Perhaps I’ll try some of that Asian Christmas work party material….)

12) When going over a joke with the word “normalcy” in it, someone once told me that “normalcy” was a big word.  Perhaps, he’s the type of person that would only understand the term “double plus normal way”.

Report 00055

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Morning Debriefing 12/16/10

December 16, 2010
Uncategorized
212 cafe, 2nd annual best doorknockers christmas pageant ever, 4/20, adam carolla, all star lanes, bar lubitsch, bill burr, brea, charlyne yi, comedy bureau, comedy crate, comedy crawl, comedy speakeasy, comedy store, comedy90210, comics and comics, culver city, downtown, eagle rock, flappers claremont, hollywood, hollywood hotel, improv, ingelwood, irvine, jimmy dore, josh and josh show, meltdown comics, SmashBox Studios, steve allen theater

1) Apparently, enough people read this blog in the LA comedy community so that The World Famous Comedy Store has taken notice.
 
The last time I heard anything from anybody at the Comedy Store was a couple a months ago when someone asked me, “Can you bring 5 people?”  I’m glad that writing ABOUT comedy as opposed to writing and performing comedy, which I still voraciously commit myself to daily/nightly, is getting me somewhere.  Thanks to all who read and there will be a night that I go to the Comedy Store/Improv/Ice House/etc. after I get some cash from Christmas “returns” and I’ll be pleasantly surprised if anybody knows who I am.

2) Yeah, there’s 12 shows on this list.  Can I make it to all of them?  Of course I can and so should you (STOP WORKING OUT THE “MOVIE PHYSICS” IN YOUR HEAD!!!) Tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL includes The Super Serious Show @ Smashbox Studios 7PM $18, Crisis on Infinite Comics and Comics 3-yr. Anniversary @ Meltdown Comics 7PM $5, Charlyne Yi @ UCB Theatre 8PM $5, Subversive Comedy w/Jimmy Dore & Friends @ Flappers Claremont 8PM $12/2 drink min., Comedy90210 @ Roxybury Cafe 8PM $5, 4 & 20 @ All Star Lanes 8PM FREE, Adam Carolla @ Irvine Improv 8PM $30/2 drink min., 2nd Annual Best Doorknockers Christmas Pageant Ever!!! @ Steve Allen Theater 8PM $10/Two-for-one $5 each, Comedy Speakeasy @ TSR Lounge 8PM FREE, Bill Burr @ Brea Improv 8PM $17/2 drink min., The Produce Section Show @ 767 Central Ave., Los Angeles, CA (downtown) 8PM FREE (say “produce section” to doorman to get in), and certainly the last, but not least by any stretch of the imagination The Josh and Josh Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE.  Not that bad, right?

3) OPEN MIC RUN: SANDWICH SPOT 3101 Ocean Park, Santa Monica, CA/Starts 7PM, COMEDY CRATE 1061 S. La Brea, Inglewood, CA/Starts 7PM, HOLLYWOOD HOTEL 1160 N. Vermont Ave., Los Angeles, CA/Starts 7PM, CAFE ON 2ND 7 S. 2nd St., Alhambra, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 7:30PM/$3 cover/10 min., SIPOLOGY 448 E. Broadway, Long Beach, CA/Sign-up 7:30PM/Starts 8PM, TKO SHOW @ 212 CAFE 212 Pier Ave., Santa Monica, CA/Starts 9PM, MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed.

4) There are actually more open mics that happen than what I list daily above in the “OPEN MIC RUN” feature.  That rundown basically lists what I think is worth your time on a nightly basis, more or less (i.e. you won’t want to entirely quit comedy after doing those rooms).  For an even more comprehensive listing, go to the Greater LA Open Mic Map, which lists every open mic I know of (constantly updated).

5) Maria Bamford’s One-Hour Homemade Christmas Special! FREE! RIGHT HERE! FROM THE COMFORT OF THE VERY POSITION THAT YOU’RE SITTING IN!!!

6) For the Comedy Bureau “Tip of the Hat”, I follow over 300 people on Twitter, am friends with over 300 comics on Facebook, and follow over 80 people on Tumblr, ALL OF WHICH IS READ BY ME (that does indeed me I read every f’n tweet/blog of every person I follow).  This is why I’m severely curtailing following more people on Twitter and Tumblr to keep my sanity.  However, if you want to be considered for the “Tip of the Hat”, you can make my life infinitely easier by submitting a status update/tweet/quote/blog post/joke/video/picture that you took/etc. to thecomedybureau@gmail.com with your name, “FYC Tip of the Hat”, and the date in the subject line.  Speaking of which…

7) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to DAVE ROSS-“@davetotheross honestly ladies, a side-hug might as well be a fork in the eye.”  Dave Ross joins the “Tip of the Hat x 2 Club” here and deservedly so with his dominating and hilarious online presence (Dave’s Cats and Pussy Podcast was nominated by Punchline Magazine as one of the Best New Podcasts of 2010) and his show Holy Fuck!, one of my favorites about town.  So… check out Dave’s fantastic website and follow him on Twitter and don’t miss the next edition of Holy Fuck! next Tuesday Dec. 21st at the Downtown Independent Theatre for completely fucking FREE!!!

8) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Bill Hicks on Marketing (RIP Bill Hicks… Dec. 16th was his birthday)

9) “Build it and they will donate.”-Cheap attempt #23 to get people to donate to the Comedy Bureau.  

10) TONIGHT: LIVE TWEETING at a Run of Shows OR Open Mics—-follow here to find out where my comedy misadventures take me tonight. (Perhaps I’ll try some of that Asian Christmas work party material….)

11) When going over a joke with the word “normalcy” in it, someone once told me that “normalcy” was a big word.  Perhaps, he’s the type of person that would only understand the term “double plus normal way”.

Report 00053

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Morning Debriefing 12/12/10

December 12, 2010
Uncategorized
alonzo bodden, ASSSCAT, bar lubitsch, brea, calendars, chatterbox, comedy bureau, comedy crawl, comedy crush, eban schletter, french toast, glendale planetarium, hollywood, improv, improv space, jeff garlin, la, marty's, mywritingprocess, palms, please thank you're welcome, race riot, sal's comedy hole, sunday sunday sunday, sunset grill, taix, ucb, west covina, west hollywood, westwood

1) Last night, instead of performing/watching comedy, I was pretty much coerced into going into my mother’s Christmas work party at the Hilton Alhambra (one of the most Asian-centric parts of town) as a form of Christmas family time bonding, which is simultaneously a horrible situation I have no desire of being in AND a great source for material, especially considering the honest, personal approach I take to my act.  Knowing that everyone’s process of developing material for performing comedy is drastically different, I’d like to offer a glimpse into my own personal process where I draw directly from personal experience.  Listed below is a series of tweets I wrote throughout the duration of the party/death march of boredom/worst quiz I have ever sat through that will probably turn into 1-2 minutes of material (will keep you updated on progress).  Perhaps, all of these random 140 characters or less thoughts will become nothing, but, either way, this is where my my comedy writing process starts…

-Surrounded by first generation Asians in the patient care industry. Already feeling uncomfortable. Step 1 complete.
-I don’t know why I checked Asian/Paciic Islander on any application. I don’t relate to any of these people. #jokesomewhere      
-I have more in common with the “table 8” sign than all the Asian people here as it doesn’t tell me, “Go to grad school.”
-Currently listening to lounge version of Girl From Impanema, which sounds like the original if it was dosed with Ambien.  
-If someone asks if I do jokes about how I’m not an Asian doctor, I would consider them heckling me in conversation  
-I’m uncomfortable with how Asian-centric this party is; I feel about as asian as Mickey Rooney in Breakfast at Tiffany’s      
-“Go ahead and speak Asian! I wasn’t going to talk to you anyway!” something I want to say at this party.  
-Yelling “I’m not Asian for fuck sakes” is a bad idea. Christmas Techno music… a much worst idea.  
-Christmas parties like this make me understand why cyanide for human consumption was discovered. #toodark? #dontcare  
-Someone who can barely speak English is giving speech; needs translator who speaks “shut the hell up I’m hungry as fuck”  
-Knowing how to use chopsticks is about as Asian as I get. #igrewupinamerica #damnit #usausausa      
-Phone was nearly dead and thus kept me from sharing my hate of this stupid party with the world.  
-in a quiz for a prize in which the answer to why did Scrooge change his mind was because he cared about people #bullshit  
-My answer to scrooge’s change of heart: fear of the proletariat rise #yeahimpretentious #ihatethisparty  
-In a room full of Asians, the answer to How many planets are there in our solar system was somehow 9. #falsestereotypes      
-“Tokyo is the most populated city, bitch and that motherfucker doesn’t deserve a TV.” Christmas brings out the best in us.
-Into hour 5 of this party and I just want to yell racial epithets so I can leave.  
-Actual Riddle for TV: Harry died on land and people were happy, David dies on land and people were happier. Who are they?      
-Answer to riddle in last tweet: they were typhoons. My answer: Go fuck yourself  
-For big screen tv, we’re asked to pick out three distinct items in a picture of a bum and a volunteer. #whyamistillhere  
-My next set of answers to this quiz are going to be shenanigans, gobbledygook , and complete and utter bullshit.  
-It irks me to think why my Dad ever wonders why I appear to be angry on stage. #6hrparty   

2) Going on tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL is a perfect alternative to going postal on people in the Grove parking structure because you want to show off this year at Christmas. Start off with Jeff Garlin’s Combo Platter @ UCB Theatre 6PM $2, then Eban Schletter’s Cosmic Christmas @ Glendale Planetarium 5PM/7PM $10, then Alonzo Bodden @ Brea Improv 7PM $17/2 item min., then Race Riot @ Hollywood Improv 7:30PM $14/2 item min., then ASSSSCAT @ UCB Theatre 7:30PM FREE, then Comedy Night @ Chatterbox 8PM FREE, then Please, Thank You, & You’re Welcome @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE, then French Toast @ Taix 8:30PM FREE, then Top Story Weekly @ iO West 9PM $5, then The Comedy Crush Bad Sweater Holiday Show @ The Hollywood Improv 9:30PM $14/2 item min., then Sunday Sunday Sunday @ Improv Space 9:30PM FREE.

3) OPEN MIC RUN: PALMS 8572 Santa Monica Blvd., West Hollywood, CA/Starts 6PM, SUNSET GRILL 7439 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA/Starts 7PM/one item min., SAL’S COMEDY HOLE 7356 Melrose Ave., Los Angeles, CA/Starts 6PM/one item min., MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed

4) The Comedy Bureau Calendars is finally updated in full!!!  Every single club listed actually goes to there Calendars/Upcoming shows page.  All of the minor inconvenience that remained on that list is now completely GONE offering you ease in searching for shows in LA unless clicking is a “big deal” for you.

5) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to JACKIE KASHIAN-“@jackiekashian I said to him, "so you’ve never done standup before?” he paused. a long time. “open mike?” he said, “well, I was on the bus this one time.” After heckling Sam Kinison many years ago, Jackie has never looked back in her vast and successful journey as a comedienne.  Touring throughout the world and having been on TV several times, she shares her uproariously funny anecdotes about her dad, her husband, and herself.  Thus, do not miss Jackie’s hilarious podcast Dorkforest or her website, blog, or Twitter.

6) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Jon Stewart Stand Up (1996)

7) If you read the Twitter feed excerpt from above, I think you’ll agree with me in wanting to donate to the Comedy Bureau.  Do so right here.

8) As I stride further and further into comedy, I seem to know less and less “real” people.  The “jury” is still out on whether this is a good or bad thing.  The Comedy Bureau will keep you updated on my/its sanity. 

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Morning Debriefing 12/9/10

December 9, 2010
Uncategorized
akaaba presents, alhambra, andre hyland, anna lee lawson, april richardson, artesia, bar lubitsch, comedy bureau, comedy crawl, comedy speakeasy, comicthon, eagle rock comedy festival, hollywood hotel, jason nash, jesse miller talk show, johnny pemberton, josh and josh show, la, laugh factory, megadrive, open mic run, paul oyen, persona, produce section show, ron babcock, seafood shack, smug shift, straight up, tsr lounge, ucb

1) For the sake of LA Comedy, I did 23 minutes at an open mic in Alhambra where I was only supposed to do 10, but was not given the light by anyone including the host, then checked out two shows of the 6 SIMULTANEOUSLY RUNNING shows at the Eagle Rock Comedy Festival, one of which was so rowdy that prompted the tweet, “@thecomedybureau Why can’t Lakers beat down the Clippers like their beating comedy right now?”.  I could have ended the night there, but from Long Beach to Alhambra to Eagle Rock, I felt the need to go to the depths of the shadiest parts of Hollywood for one of the best shows in town to end the night properly, “The Jesse Miller Talk Show”.  With Ron Babcock, April Richardson, Jason Nash (who brought a REAL homeless man on stage with him), Johnny Pemberton (check him out as the badass host of Megadrive tonight MTV 11PM), and the Jesse Miller Mogul Management crew (Andre Hyland as Jesse Miller, Anna Lee Lawson as Tanya Starlet, Paul Oyen as Daryl, and Matthew Cardapole as the for-hire Elf), the night was emphatically ended with a howl and “straight-up” huge laughs when, as depicted above, there was a contest to throw a real Christmas wreath in attempt to land it on top of Daryl’s head.  This comedy sojourn was all for the sake of LA Comedy, which is why at one point in the night, I yelled, “I AM THE COMEDY BUREAU!”

2) Be part of LA Comedy history with the groundbreaking comedy spectacles on tonight’s COMEDY CRAWL with Day 4 of Comicthon @ Hollywood Laugh Factory HAPPENING RIGHT NOW (going for world record for longest running continuous live comedy show) one unwrapped toy, Eagle Rock Comedy Festival @ Center for the Arts, Eagle Rock & More 8PM FREE, The Comedy Speakeasy @ The TSR Lounge 8PM FREE (call 323-568-1616 to be part of live audience), Persona @ The Hollywood Improv Lab 8:30PM $5, The Josh and Josh Show @ Bar Lubitsch 8:30PM FREE, The Produce Section Show @ 761 Central Ave., Los Angeles, CA 8:30PM FREE (say “produce section” to doorman to get in), and The Last Akaaba Presents @ The Seafood Shack (that isn’t the name of the show; it’s really their last show) 8:30PM FREE, Smug Shift @ UCB Theatre 9:30PM $5

3) OPEN MIC RUN: HOLLYWOOD HOTEL 1160 N. Vermont Ave., Los Angeles, CA/Starts 7PM, THE SANDWICH SPOT 3101 Ocean Park Ave., Santa Monica, CA/Starts 7PM, CAFE ON 2ND 7 S. 2nd St., Alhambra, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 7:30PM/$3 cover/10 min. guaranteed, SIPOLOGY 448 E. Broadway, Long Beach, CA/Sign-up 7PM/Starts 8PM/must work clean and no material on religion and politics, TKO SHOW @ 212 CAFE 212 Pier Ave., Santa Monica, CA/Starts 9PM, MARTY’S/THE OPEN MIC 7351 W. Sunset Blvd., Hollywood, CA (walk up Martel past Big Mama’s and Papa’s)/5PM to 11PM/$5/multiple sets allowed.

4) As suggested above, you should never miss Andre Hyland’s Jesse Miller’s Talk Show and now the opportunity to do so is now available. STRAIGHT UP!  The Jesse Miller “Straight Up” DVD is now available from Andre Hyland himself featuring over 20 different videos of Jesse Miller and his clients at Mogul Management including clips from their Comedy Central Pilot, Jesse walking around Cincinnati shouting that the Bengals are going to the Super Bowl with the tattoos to prove it, and other ‘Hard as Hell’ videos.  Go to source for the “Straight Up” DVD here.

5) Comedic force of nature Mike O’Connell has made a book of his thoughts in poetry form available to the public TO WITNESS HIS MAD GENIUS!!!  Please pick up ’Impractical Pocket Poesy’ here.

6) Rooftop Comedy National College Comedy Competition is BACK!!!  Coming in spring, the competition will scour 32 different schools to find the best in comedy (categories include Stand Up and Films) all across the U.S.  Also, submission is completely FREE! Check back at the Comedy Bureau for more details.

7) The Comedy Bureau “Tips Its Hat” today to EDDIE PEPITONE: “@eddiepepitone Twitter is God’s way of saying fuck you to the novel.”  Eddie is not only a prolific “tweeter”, but to see him live is to experience comedic brilliance like you’ve never seen before.  You can actually have the privilege of doing so tonight at Persona @ The Hollywood Improv Lab 8:30PM $5 (mentioned above) and this Saturday Dec. 11th “Tomorrow w/Ron Lynch” @ Steve Allen Theater (4773 Hollywood Blvd. in Los Feliz) MIDNIGHT $8 or vote for him as the Best Tweeter for Punchline Magazine’s Punchlist 2010 via Facebook here.  Oh yeah, don’t miss his website and, just in case I haven’t made it quite clear, FOLLOW EDDIE PEPITONE ON TWITTER right here.

8) From the “You Should Have Been There” Lagoon: Andy Kaufman “I Trusted You”

9) The Comedy Bureau Donation Box is still waiting for a 2nd donation.

10) “Be offensive.  Say some racist shit.  Be fucking offensive. Fuck it.  If someone gets pissed, fuck it.”-Real person that I met two days ago

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